My recent reconnecting with my swim coach again, reminded me a few things plus...learning some new things in the process. I mentioned "method" in a recent post. I didn't mention this at the time but my coach exhibited "Mastery" at his craft. He was a master....fortunately me, my master in that respect.
The term "methodology" is really what we're taking about here : A methodology is a structured, systematic, and consistent set of methods, principles, and procedures used in a specific discipline, research project, or analysis to achieve objectives and ensure validity.
I see a lot a familiar words there in the discussions on this forum. And since ( starting at age 6 ) I had two different sets of methodologies happening simultaneously, even as a 6 year old....I could immediately tell the difference. It was like night and day, it was sooooo obvious!!
Both my parents did discipline me when I didn't adhere to the rules or acted out, either way. And both used different methodologies in their approach. My mom's approach was much softer and less traumatic than my dad. That's doesn't mean her approach was the right one...it just wasn't "the flame thrower" approach...scorched earth, raising the room to the ground. Fear was most definitely the motivator! That was the lesson. Be very afraid! He was a master at pain and fear !
My mom's approach was less threatening but...not very effective. I wasn't afraid of my mom, but her reward and punishment ( decipline ) was.....disconnected ?? I think that's a good description. It didn't connect anything real...to anything that was happening or to what did so that lesson wasn't actually useful. It was a failed lesson in other words. Novice class....amateur standing.
I remember my first grade school teacher...and actually not very well. She was an older lady and looked very "stern"...kind of disgruntled looking all the time, like she was constipated all the time...didn't smile much. She had this thing she did, when kids talked in class ( uh oh....you can almost guess what was coming ) she'd sneak up behind you..and with one hand...she'd grab your neck, pinching it really hard and do the "death shake" on you. You know, like dogs do with a toy...shaking their head violently from side to side to "kill their prey". It's just what dogs do...it's an instinctual thing. Anyway...I just remembered having it done often and it would scare the hell put of you. The death shake part was an added measure just to add insult to injury. And of course it didn't work. Compared to my dad, this woman was child's play. It definitely wasn't traumatic, it didn't really scare me and it didn't hurt much.
And it definitely DID NOT stop me froming talking in class. I spent hours in the hall throughout my grade school experience. I was so use to it...I'd take off and wander the halls exploring...looking in the windows of other classes ( waving at friends ) and it was pretty much a good time...like "extra reccess". Very convenient. As a punishment...it WAS NOT a punishment! Lol But in terms of Mastery and methodology....my first grade teacher was maybe...novice class + 1. Instead of a private...she was a corporal ( punn intended ).
But in a direct comparison between the two major figures in my life at the time...since it was happening simultaneously, I can tell you what I learned and didn't learn from these different methodologies.
In the novice class methodology. I learned pain, fear and disconnected ideas from reality that didn't teach me anything but to be afraid of the punishment. It didn't stop me from doing "the thing" I was being punished for. If I had to grade my own teachers.. they'd get an F. F - ...if that were possible. That even includes my mom but she'd get an A- ...only because she didn't know what she was doing and she was not trained to be a teacher. The minus was for...room for improvement.
And then there's master...who had Mastery of his craft. I already mentioned his other peers and went to him for this very reason. What I learned from him was "self decipline" and to master my own thoughts and feeling ...counter to what the pain and my body was telling me what to do. This is a completely different approach.
Instead of .."discipline" from an external source ( teachers death shaking my neck in an ambush, shock and awe type..approach to get me to stop talking....which was completely worthless ( F- for sure ). He taught "self decipline" and "discipline of the mind" instead. Thats Mastery...Master Class. It doesn't get any better than this. Grade A+++++++++++ He was also a school teacher...I had him for the equivalent of what was at one time called "Civics". Not what they called it but thats kind of what it was. I also got an A in his class. Go figure right ?
What occurred to me just the other day that I never really realized or thought about before. It just never dawned on me until now. I'm not just a swimmer....I was an "Elite Athelete" in my particular discipline. I never considered myself that but in reality. That's what I was. And my coach was an "Elite Athelete" trainer or coach. He was "Elite" himself tho. Because you can't get better than Mastery. There's no place left to go when you've reached the top.
And I will never forget, one of the best lessons he taught me in swimming. Because it wasn't in swimming ...it was in a different area of discipline...which I kind of needed at the time. I know I told this story before, but I'll retell it differently this time.
One of my special talents on the team was as "prankster". I had a thing for playing practical jokes but not everyone was abused. My team mates were, but not so much the parents of my teammates, as I was deemed "a bad influence" in terms of "discipline ". I had Mastery of my craft too! ...and I took it to another level. My finest work...so to speak...was the "honey on the toilet seat " masterpiece. It was flawlessly perfect in every way. I had laid out the honey on that black institutional toilet seat so that...it was a seemless layer of honey, so perfectly laid out that it looked like a glossy new toilet seat with verbally no way you could tell it was not, just a shiny new toilet seat with a gloss finish. I spent considerable time ..spreading it out, feathering it, moving it around so it looked no different than a new finish. I took my time is what I'm saying. This was the pinnacle of practical jokes ....it was Mastery...it was my Masterpiece!!
And because we ( my friends and I ) knew it worked from the disgruntled looks on the faces on a few of the men ...leaving the bathroom....I also new, that one of those men went and complained to the powers that be. So when my coach shows up and says...( not...did one of you do this??) but...Which one of you did this? I had no choice but to raise my hand because....everyone knew ( including him ) which "one" that was. And of course...my work stood alone because...I was a master at my craft and this one...took the cake as they say.
So...instead of disciplining me, punishing me, doing what MOST other novice class teachers would do....he devised his own practical joke to play on me ....which was also Mastery at its finest. He even elicited the help of another well known coach...so the complexity of this joke had just advanced into another level beyond on own. This was just a "title for tat" matching my joke kind of thing. He took my joke and raised me one...which ended up teaching me a very good lesson. Having the other coach...pretend he was one of my victims, and scaring the crap out of me at the time, my coach was sitting outside the room listening and laughing...then, when the prank was over and I was peaking out if the door to see if the coast was clear ...and my coach seeing my face and he erupted in laughter ( along with the other coach erupting in laughter...I couldn't help as I walked away erupting in laughter too. I thought....that was master class...superior to my own!! ( at age 13 ).
What I can say now that I couldn't say then. My coach, was not only a great teacher and coach...but he himself, had a bit of me in him. I'm not speculating here. He was a BIG KID himself which is why he knew exactly what to do. He had to do something ( to manage the disgruntled parents ) but deep down, both those coaches were going...."that was good one". Because it really was! Instead of punishing me, and disciplining me, he got down on my level and one upped me instead. It made me feel for just a moment, how angry someone could be...from sitting on a toilet with honey on it...but immediately letting me get back to the business at hand. Breaking my spirit was not going to produce Elite results in the pool. I still had races to compete in...but that was his deal. He didn't break your spirit...he help you create your own. That's why he was Master. And that's what he did every day.
So in comparison... My spirit was broken at home...then counteracted by my spirit being lifted at the same time by my coach. If anything...his Mastery was a master class in spirit. That's the difference between these two methodologies. One breaks you...the other one repairs what was broken.
