Meandering Conversations

ADHD & Marriage News - December 9, 2025

Quote of the Week

“Not all those who wander are lost.”

- J.R. R. Tolkien

The ADHD mind wanders…a lot! It comes upon something interesting and off it goes, exploring it! And conversations often meander, too. I had one man with ADHD tell me that he ‘liked to talk about things in the same way that a movie unfolds – with overlapping plot lines.’ His ‘straight-line-from-point-A-to-point-B’ wife was completely fed up!

Having a mind (and conversational style) that meanders takes time. It doesn’t arrive at its landing point in the fastest possible way. Yet wandering is not an indication that the person is broken or doesn’t have a valid point of view. It’s just stylistic. Furthermore, that meandering can bring really interesting ideas…if you only have the patience to follow the journey.

Note to non-ADHD partners: it’s my experience that non-ADHD partners may not understand WHY the ideas brought in by mental exploration and meandering are interesting at the time…in my own case, my own desire to ‘get things done so I could move on’ (i.e. impatience) got in the way of appreciating the twists and turns of my ADHD family members’ minds. It was not until my kids were a bit older and I could start to slow down more that I could enjoy these ‘journeys’ with my family members more.

So here’s the kicker. If you slow down and learn to enjoy the journey simply because your partner is taking you on it, three things can happen: your partner starts to open up to you more often; your partner starts to feel more appreciated and happy; and you actually start to enjoy yourself because you and your partner are sharing more deeply. You become more connected.

What could you start doing to ‘enjoy the journey’ more?

REGISTRATION OPEN:

LIVE Couples' Seminar with Melissa Orlov - The ADHD Effect In-Depth

➤ REGISTER NOW Starts Jan 14th

9 Sessions / Wednesdays, 8:00pm - 9:45pm EST. Melissa's premier seminar has changed the lives of many, many couples impacted by ADHD. It provides hope, information and the tools you need to move towards a HAPPIER, HEALTHIER & THRIVING RELATIONSHIP.
The next live seminar will be in Spring, 2026.

NON-ADHD Partner Support Groups

➤ REGISTER NOW Starts Jan 5th

Does your partner have ADHD? Each Zoom session focuses on one or two topics chosen by group members for in-depth exploration.

Non-ADHD support groups' objectives:

Join a community exploring similar issues
Learn from each other's successes & struggles
Find new, more effective ways to be your best self in your relationship.

i2a Masterclass: Mastering Learning Conversation

➤ REGISTER NOW Jan 7th

Free, one-hour webinar — How to Turn Tension into Understanding in ADHD-Impacted Relationships. Learning conversations are structured, compassionate dialogues that replace blame with curiosity and create safety for real connection. Discover practical strategies, examples and tools to apply at home right away! Plus, ask your questions live with an ADHD & Marriage Expert Consultant.

Seminars, Groups:

Intent to Action (i2a) Membership Program - (Registration Ongoing - Subscribe by Dec 31, 2025 to secure the special rate). i2a helps couples impacted by ADHD find practical strategies, a safe space to work through challenges, and a supportive community of peers. Our mission is to equip you with actionable expert guidance, a reduced sense of isolation, and foster real, lasting change in your relationships. Learn more and sign up here! i2a Masterclass: Mastering Learning Conversation - Jan 7th.

Live ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar - (Registration Open, Starts Jan 14th) Is your relationship in trouble? Melissa and senior consultants help partners improve their lives together in this premier 9-session ZOOM seminar that has changed the lives of many, many couples impacted by ADHD. Mental Health Professionals, learn about our Affiliates Program.

The Self-Study Seminar - (Ongoing) Move at your own pace. Includes materials & recordings from recent live seminar lessons and Q&As. 3 months of Office Hours to support your learning! Military and Mental Health Professional discounts.

Non ADHD Partner Support Group - (Registration Open, Starts Jan 5th) - Join a community exploring similar issues; learn from each other's successes and struggles; find new, more effective ways to be your best self in your relationship.

Foundations in Habit Development - This special series is for ADHD partners who have completed The ADHD Effect Couples' Seminar. This two month program helps you solidify the changes you have started to make.

ADHD & Marriage Consulting Group - (Ongoing) - Work with an ADHD expert who understand the issues faced by individuals and couples impacted by ADHD. We STRONGLY recommend you also take the ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar

Couples Support Group - (Full) - Seven sessions. 5 couples only will work with Internal Family Systems (IFS) master facilitator, Jason Weber, to understand what ‘parts’ of themselves are participating in the parent-child dynamics and learn how to compassionately move away from it.

Therapist Training & more - (Ongoing) - For counselors, therapists, social workers, coaches, and other professionals who currently work with adults and couples impacted by ADHD, or who would like training to help improve their skills in this important therapeutic area.

Free Resources:

Is there hope? This video may help you answer that question:

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