ADHD & Marriage News - March 30, 2023

Quote of the Week

“You can’t give from an empty cup.”

- the daughter of a friend, encouraging her to work less and sleep more



Some people are natural givers and caretakers.  We are so lucky to have them in our lives.  And yet, it is too easy to ‘over-give’ to one’s own detriment.


What does over-giving look like?  A few examples:

  • Working so hard you rarely sleep
  • Always putting other people’s needs ahead of your own
  • Taking it upon yourself to educate other adults about how they might do better

How does over-giving show up in your own life?  Perhaps you…

  • Feel under-appreciated or resentful you must take on so much
  • Are sleep deprived on behalf of others
  • Regularly rescue others from their messes or problems
  • Feel depleted or depressed
  • Feel responsible for other adults’ outcomes

Giving is wonderful.  But too much giving takes a real toll – on your health (you need that sleep and less stress!); on your family (you aren’t available to them when you are depleted); on your relationships (repeatedly rescuing a partner often feels like a put down to that partner) and more.

I urge you to take some time to think about what you need to feel more emotionally and physically whole, and then start pursuing some of that.  Others can, and should, get along without quite so much help from you.  Try it!  Even in small shift in ‘over-giving’ can make a big difference.



Resources For those in relationships impacted by ADHD


ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar - Is your relationship in trouble? My highly acclaimed 8-session Zoom seminar has helped many couples thrive in healthier, happier relationships. 

Non ADHD Partner Support Group (two session have openings) and ADHD New Habit Coaching Group (Apr - Jun 2023 full) - Be part of a community exploring similar issues, successes and struggles and find new, effective ways to be your best self in your relationship.


How to Optimize Treatment for Adult ADHD

Downloadable chapters of my books;

A community forum with other couples facing similar issues;

A large number of blog posts on various topics;



ADULT ADHD CAN HAVE A HUGE IMPACT ON YOUR RELATIONSHIP. ADHDmarriage.com can literally change your life! 

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© 2023 Melissa Orlov