Too Much Pressure

ADHD & Marriage News - March 15, 2018

Quote of the Week

“In an achievement-oriented culture, we often feel ashamed if we can’t handle exorbitant amounts of pressure, because it seems like everyone else can.  We think there must be some problem with us, and we keep quiet about it."

- Aviva Romm, MD

Too Much Pressure

Stress impacts us all.  For ADHD partners it makes symptoms worse.  For non-ADHD partners, it makes patience and empathy hard to find.  It’s exhausting and emotionally draining.  And yet, we ‘accept stress’ with phrases such as “I’m not in control – this is how it’s done” and “I would like to have less stress in my life, but there’s just too much to do!”

I’m here to tell you that for most of us this is simply not true.  Once your basic needs are met, you do have some options for reducing stress.  Here are just a few tactics:

• Times during the day without electronic connections

• Learn to say “no” when others ask you to add to your obligations

• Meditate and exercise

• Ruthlessly cull your ‘to do’ list

• Set time aside for people and relationships, rather than chores

• Hold your partner at the end of the day (or beginning)

• Say ‘thank you’ and ‘I love you’ regularly


What stress could you eliminate?


Work with Melissa in-person... Silver Springs, MD March 22-24 and London in May. Learn more.

For those in marriages impacted by ADHD

You can find great resources for couples impacted by ADHD at, including free:

  • -   Online treatment overview;

    -   Downloadable chapters of my books;

    -   A community forum with other couples facing similar issues;

      -   A large number of blog posts on various topics;

      -   Referrals.

Is your relationship in trouble? Consider my highly acclaimed couples' course: ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar - This 8-session phone seminar has helped many couples thrive in healthier, happier relationships. Next live course begins in October, 2018.

Is your relationship in pretty good shape but you'd love to feel closer? Consider my self-study seminar Recovering Intimacy in Your Relationship.

Adult ADHD can have a huge impact on your relationship. can literally change your life!  Question? Contact Melissa.

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© 2018 Melissa Orlov