Reinforce the Positive

ADHD & Marriage News - November 19, 2025

Quote of the Week

“Whether you think you can or you think you can't, you're right”

- Hallowell NYC Center wall

Research in psychology and behavioral science clearly shows us that how we think about our situation – and our future – impacts what happens next. In fact, fMRI scans demonstrate that our outlooks impact the actual wiring of our brains. When we practice mindfulness, for example, the parts of our brain that reinforce the positive and optimism become stronger.

In relationships impacted by ADHD, thinking you can or can’t is critically important. If you convince yourself that past struggles will always continue because that’s been the pattern in the past (before you knew how to handle ADHD and responses to ADHD) then little progress will be made. Every positive change will be discounted as an aberration, rather than as a move towards a brighter, and better, future.

Eventually, the idea that ‘we can’t do this’ will become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Instead, choose to stay open to the positive:

Non-ADHD partners do best when they learn to say ‘thank you’ and ‘I noticed that!’
ADHD partners thrive when they think “I may have fallen short of my goal right now, but I CAN do this!”
Celebrate small victories, and don’t interpret the inevitable stumbles as an indication that change is impossible.

Yes, you can!

Highlights:

December 3, 2025, 7:30-8:30pm EST - i2a Masterclass: Mastering Learning Conversation - Reserve your spot today.

Free, one-hour webinar — How to Turn Tension into Understanding in ADHD-Impacted Relationships

Want to talk to your partner without it turning into a fight or a shutdown?

Learning conversations are structured, compassionate dialogues that replace blame with curiosity and create safety for real connection.

Discover practical strategies, examples, and have a chance to ask your questions live with an ADHD & Marriage Expert Consultant.

Learn More and RSVP Now! Apply these tools at home right away!

Registration Open - Non ADHD Partner Support Group

Seminars, Groups:

Intent to Action (i2a) Membership Program - (Registration Ongoing) i2a helps couples impacted by ADHD find practical strategies, a safe space to work through challenges, and a supportive community of peers. Our mission is to equip you with actionable expert guidance, a reduced sense of isolation, and foster real, lasting change in your relationships. Learn more and sign up here!

Intent to Action (i2a) Book Club - Experts talk about their books. Join us!

December 1st 7:30p EST: We're thrilled to announce that Dr. Sharon Saline will join us on to talk about her fabulous book What Your ADHD Child Wishes You Knew.
"In the Community Forum and Office Hours I got ideas for how to look at things from my partners point of view, and it helped me so much to get direction on a different way to handle a long term issue -- and it really helped where I was really stuck!" (Non ADHD Partner)

Live ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar - Is your relationship in trouble? Melissa and senior consultants help partners improve their lives together in this premier 9-session ZOOM seminar that has changed the lives of many, many couples impacted by ADHD. Mental Health Professionals, learn about our Affiliates Program.

The Self-Study Seminar - (Ongoing) Move at your own pace. Includes materials & recordings from recent live seminar lessons and Q&As. 3 months of Office Hours to support your learning! Military and Mental Health Professional discounts.

Non ADHD Partner Support Group - (Registration open) - Join a community exploring similar issues; learn from each other's successes and struggles; find new, more effective ways to be your best self in your relationship.

Foundations in Habit Development - This special series is for ADHD partners who have completed The ADHD Effect Couples' Seminar. This two month program helps you solidify the changes you have started to make.

ADHD & Marriage Consulting Group - (Ongoing) - Work with an ADHD expert who understand the issues faced by individuals and couples impacted by ADHD. We STRONGLY recommend you also take the ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar

Couples Support Group - (Full) - Seven sessions. 5 couples only will work with Internal Family Systems (IFS) master facilitator, Jason Weber, to understand what ‘parts’ of themselves are participating in the parent-child dynamics and learn how to compassionately move away from it.

Therapist Training & more - (Ongoing) - For counselors, therapists, social workers, coaches, and other professionals who currently work with adults and couples impacted by ADHD, or who would like training to help improve their skills in this important therapeutic area.

Free Resources:

Is there hope? This video may help you answer that question:

Register for free marriage tips here! "Your weekly messages are beyond wonderful to receive, I cannot thank you enough! Please know the gifts that you give are treasured."