Recent forum posts (all topics)

I have been reading a lot on this forum lately, finished Melissa's book and have been to two therapists for myself.  I posted the issue about my husband's difficulty with parenting tasks and his possible ADHD.  I've tried to get him to his doctor to get evaluated (won't go) and tried to get us into marital counselling (he keeps telling me"Let's just try this and if it doesn't work we'll go", but I know he is very resistant to going).  The problems are definitely starting to affect our 3 year old.

This is my first time posting to any forum like this regarding my husbands adhd. I am curious if anyone has experienced a husband who hyper focuses on a business that seems to consume him. He can't hold down a steady job because he is convinced that this business is the end all be all (we will be debt free, I will be happier, etc.). We have been married for 10 years now and I am pretty numb. The job changes, increases in debt, cross country moves, and general instability have taken their toll on me.

He is obsessed with movies and his fantasy life and resents me and our daughter for getting in the way of his enjoyment and freedom. He wanted to go see X Men on Friday and hey, I would like to see it actually (he knows I've seen all the other ones) but he didn't ask if I wanted to or try to make a "date" or anything, he just asked hey would you mind if *I* go see the new X Men and I said well it is late already and I wasn't too keen on that at the time. Plus I mean, hey I want to see it as well so like thanks for thinking of me, right?

MELISSA, the original Slug Box thread is very long now. May we start a continuation thread? If not, please have your WebAdmin remove it, thank you.

Again, this is a continuation of THE SLUG BOX thread for both AD/HD and non-AD/HD persons to drop off their "slugs". Ideally a line or two.  

It was 9:30 pm.  I was watching TV.  My spouse came home, walked into the living room and asked, "Do you want something for supper?  I'm going to grill some hamburgers."

Sure frustrated the heck out of me.  9:30 at night.  I just responded, "No thanks.  I've already eaten."  Bubbling up in me was the boiling sarcasm: "Um, NO.  Dinner time is between 5:30 and 6:30."  I had lost a majority of these battles over the past 20+ years, and gave up the ghost on the war.    

I am wondering if anyone out there that has ADHD can answer my question? Does my spouse notice the amount of effort I make to keep peace and happiness in the home? 

Today was our first visit with a 2nd LMHC, in this new cycle of 'seeing someone' to try to find ourselves a path to improve our relationship, and immediately this counselor heard the familiar complaints of ADHD-affected marriages.  She began finishing our sentences for us!  I could not believe it! My wife was excited that here was a person who could relate.  Someone who seemed to know her mind (my wife's), yet we only just met.  

Trust.  My ADHD spouse cannot/will-not/does-not trust anyone. Not me.  Not our two children.  He seems to be always on guard, behaving in such a way that he thinks we are ready to pounce to take advantage of a slight lapse in his armor.

Accepting help from those who LOVE you and DO NOT want to control you is something I wish my spouse could learn.  

Has anyone else seen this?  What does it mean when son goes completely catatonic?  He stands rigid.  You could actually knock him over.  No eye contact.  Smirk on face, with expression held like that.  This could go on for an hour.  Nothing reaches him--not touching him, speaking to him.  No clear sense of what triggers it.  First occurred maybe 2 years ago in the midst of ADHD battles and pleas over deadlines, etc.

Just curious. Has anyone ever wondered what its like for people that don't have ADHD? How 'simple' life is without it? How easy it is for them to multi-task and juggle multiple things at once? In no way, shape, or form do I want sympathy. Curiosity got the better of me :-)