When I talk about lying problems in relationships, I'm not just talking about partners with ADHD. Either partner can lie...and lies also exist in relationships in which there is no ADHD. But there are some ways that the presence of ADHD increases the chances that one or the other partner will lie. To be able to chart the best course to move away from lying in your own relationship, you must first understand why the lying is happening. Choosing to lie is a decision that is made – not typically a beneficial one for a relationship, but often a logical one at some level. Understanding the logic really helps. There are at least 7 common reasons partners choose to lie, which include:
Is lying a part of your relationship? Are you eager to move past the lies to a more trusting partnership? This is the first of several posts that will deal with lies and rebuilding trust in relationships impacted by ADHD.
Adults with ADHD often suffer from co-existing conditions that can make their lives – and the lives of their partners – even more complicated. Here is a list of seven of the most common conditions that ride along with ADHD and information about why it's important to understand if you have any of them. The numbers included here are taken from multiple research studies:
“It is not me nor my spouse that is broken. It is the relationship that is broken.” These wise words were posted in the forum not too long ago. A breath of fresh air and some great perspective – so much clearer than blaming your partner!