I'm just curious how this next step works. I'm done attempting to help my husband with ADHD. Nothing works and I'm simply tired of trying. Honestly, I don't want to divorce for financial reasons. I like the lifestyle we have and I don't want to give that up. I don't love my husband and I don't hate him - we are more like roommates where one person does most of the work and the other person is more than happy with that arrangement. We have two kids so most of our interactions are as a family. We don't fight because I gave up trying to get support out of him many years ago. The kids are leaving next year for college and I think he sees this as a chance to reconcile. This is never going to happen. I plan on using this time to do all the things I want for myself and essentially not worrying about anyone else.
For the most part I think my husband is okay with the current arrangement as it requires very little from him. Occasionally (usually after he's had a few drinks), he comes to me all teary-eyed and wants to know what he can do to fix things. And the answer is nothing. It's not the time to discuss that with him as he's not super rational after a few drinks so I usually play along until I can politely exit the conversation.
At the end of the day, I'd rather he just accept this as our fate and stop bringing it up. I think if we have a big conversation about it, it will just kickstart him to "try harder". And as you all know, that won't last.
Has anyone else transitioned to just living separate lives under the same roof? Does it work? Did you have a big conversation or just fade into this lifestyle? How do I get him to stop bringing it up?






