Recent forum posts (all topics)

I read an article this morning in ADDitude that had the physical effect of a sock right in my stomach - it rang so true to my life's experience in my marriage - it made my stomach quite squeezey.

Here is a link - (Admin, if not allowed, I understand if you disable or delete it) 

https://www.additudemag.com/fear-of-failure-adhd-emotions/  

Hello to all again - splitting off a sub-topic from my first attempt at posting here (which seems to have a ton of new replies since I last checked)...

I find myself stuck in a very deep rut for the last 2-3 years when it comes to saying things to my partner when she's upset, or to keep her from getting upset in the first place. "Second-guessing" was listed as a hurtful pattern in an ADHD marriage, but in my case it goes the other way. Her anger and her instantaneous blow-ups have things stuck in neutral.

My husband dropped another bomb on me (by now I should be used to it). I wanted to discuss going to an ADHD specialist or a psychiatrist who can help us with his ADHD (I don't think he has ADHD). He straight up told me that I am prohibited to discuss anything about his medications and medical history or anything related with anyone, even his doctor as he has removed me as his contact and it would be a HIPAA violation and I will end up in prison. Can I really not even discuss what his medication abuse is doing to us and all the side effects?

Hello,

6 years ago, when my frustrations reached a boiling point in our marraige, I urged us to start seeing a therapist. The issues, for me, were related to distraction, avoidance, inconsistency, reactivity, unreliability... in retrospect what I know know is the spectrum of ADHD behaviors. I wasn't fully aware of ADHD at the time but I brought it up in therapy but it was shot down by the MC and my H. The MC wanted to help us communicate better. My H said that he didn't want to be labeled and wanted me to take more blame for our problems. Yes, in retrospect, I was very, very angry.

My husband has been diagnosed with ADHD since he was a child. We have been married for 8 years and have two young children. He has tried medication and counseling, but never stuck with anything. Except going out to smoke pot 4 nights a week, because it "helps him".

I have tolerated a lot over the years. Lying, excessive spending, he never takes responsibility and if I try to discuss any issues we have, I am a bully or making a big deal out of nothing.

I thought I was at the end of my rope any times, but now I may really have to leave.

My ADHD husband suddenly and unexpectedly passed away three weeks ago at the age of 57.  There will forever be unresolved issues that I will have to find a way to let go of now.  So many things I don't understand about all of his negative behaviors and actions. 

Ive seen many comments from spouses & I understand your frustration. But it seems as though some of you think we do things on purpose. I can only speak for myself but I can tell you that being the one living with & having many issues is no picnic. I have ADD, OCD,intermittent explosive disorder & I suffer from anxiety as well as some other issues. I was not diagnosed until I was in my 30s. I had a very hard time staying awake in school much less focusing. Everything just got worse the older I got. I have many trust issues as well.