Recent forum posts (all topics)

My wife is looking to get divorced after five years of marriage. She says I get focused on a task or a slight, become frustrated - voice a passive aggressive statement or a mean comment, then once that is spouted - I'm fine. But I leave her hurting in the meantime. 

The stimulus creating the frustration is unimportant - the fact that I take out my anger on my wife, is horrid. 

 

I want to be clear - I do not physically harm anyone, only with my mouth. 

 

I need to control it better. 

 

I'm spending the holidays with my ADHD BiPolar II diagnosed, and medically treated boyfriend.  We've been together for 2 years.  I think he's a confused genius and he's hilarious and lovely to be around.  When he's engaged and all there.  As i've learned from reading around, the hyper-focus ends, and i actually found that to be somewhat of a relief, but we've moved in together as of a couple months ago, and I have to say, it's been one of the hardest things i've ever done.  I've been in other long term relationships, and i've *never* had the difficulties i am having in this one.

In the need for humor?  One my favorite comedy sketches....on the topic of arguing.  Enjoy.

https://youtu.be/kQFKtI6gn9Y

 

J

My husband has been severely depressed for the last two years.  He's been taking citalopram for about a year now.  During this year, I have suggested to him numerous times, to find another med.  He is still depressed, can't sleep because the med makes him feel awake, and is down right mean sometimes.  After realizing the citalopram might be making him less empathetic towards people and situations, I talked to him about it and backed up the information with research.  I also told him that I went off citalopram in the past for the same reason- I became a jerk, I didn't care about anyone or an

I think the hardest thing for me at the moment is dealing with H not being present. We did Melissa's couples course last year and things were going great. H was having regular appointments and he was really really making an effort to create an intentional relationship. fast forward a year and yet again the downward spiral has started. It started going downhill when we went and stayed with a friend of mine for the weekend a few months ago. He forgot to take his meds and spent most of the weekend on his phone not really speaking to anyone.

My husband is having difficulty really believing ADHD is part of him. His explosive anger tempers are drainign for me and my children. My son talks to me how sad he is but clams up and is unable to approach his father. The baby stats screaming or hiding when he is angry. 

We have frustrating interactions where my husband thinks he's caught me saying something inaccurate and corrects me.  After he tells me I'm wrong, and bat whatever it is around, often he reverses himself and then tries to claim he never made the original statement. I don't think he means to hurt my feelings, he is just backtracking from his impulsive first statement, but the cover-up and rationalizations are fierce. This drives me around the bend.

Honeyblonde started a great conversation in this section entitled,  "His Tantrums are killing me...."  

Does anybody recognise this?

A single succes re-enforces the typical stubborness that ADD diagnosed seem to have?

Below examples are work related, I DO NOT WANT TO GO OFF-TOPIC FOR THIS SITE, but I have a nagging suspicion that I bring the same attitude into my relationship.

 

Once I get something right... oh see, nothing's wrong, what issues?.

 

Good afternoon all,

I just discovered this website last week while I was sick from stress, and decided today to join.  I could write a dissertation on my challenges, but I will try to sum it up succinctly.  I was so relieved to find other people dealing WITH THE EXACT SAME ISSUES as me.  I really believed that I was going crazy and was failing because I continue to be missing something in my marriage.  However, after reading some other posts, I could have it much worse.  I'm happy to fill in specific details, but here is a brief summary: