Recent forum posts (all topics)

I don't know if it's ego or just the "here and now" belief and desire that "this time" will be different that causes them to not consider that the last time or many previous times, "their way," won't work.

 

H consistently tries to carry in too much from the car at one time.  Too often, something gets dropped and broken.  Occasionally, he's able to carry in a lot, but the risk isn't worth it.   Who would carry 10 things and a baby if half the time you drop the baby??   (that is just an analogy).

 

My wife and I are reading Dr. Orlov's book and think we are missing a key building block; working with someone like a coach or therapist that specializes in ADHD. Upon looking into such we are having a difficult time finding a specialist in the area. We have tried using resources available through our current health care provider, Kaiser, but they have no specialists on staff apparently. We have been in contact with a few independent coaches but really have no idea who to pursue. Does anyone have any recommendations or referrals?  Thx!

Anyone else experience this?

 

I can't tell you how many times my H has told me that various things are "broken" when they're not.  Usually, he doesn't have them plugged in, or he isn't using it right, or some little thing is not set up correctly, so the item won't turn on.  

 

hi, I'm new here. I was diagnosed with ADD long ago, was put on meds and when my mom didn't like the effects, I was taken off. My grades suffered and I never did graduate. I was 2 credits short. I never did blame ADD. I took on the idea that ADD wasn't even a thing. I was just a slacker. Well fast forward to recently. I saw an article about ADD and while scoffing, decided to read it anyways. I was astounded by how many boxes I ticked. I probably wouldn't give it a second thought if my relationship wasn't suffering.

Hey everyone,

I am so glad I found this forum. I literally googled how do I handle my ADHD husband not being able to get to work on time? This forum was in the search results. I just spent a little while reading some of the posts. Oh man is it a relief to know that there are others. I thought I was the only person on this earth crazy enough to put up with some of the things that go on.

After months of trying and realizing how futile it is to get a wife who hates your ADHD was to see you as anything but an idiot, I have asked for a separation. We still live together and our child is not aware if he break. Its a little awkward but I think better than before. Here are ten reasons why: 1) Renewed intimacy. Before I stupidly went about life hoping that I can somehow miraculously earn affection and sex by not being myself for long enough. Now I can relax and if a woman finds me attractive I can pursue. about half a dozen women seem interested. I feel like a man again.

ADHD,

I have come to loathe your name; in fact, I don’t want to give you any recognition by having a full name.  I want you to have only initials.  It is hard enough for me to recognize and accept your existence.  I won’t dignify our relationship by letting you have a full name in my mind.

My ADHD husband grew up with parents that constantly bailed him out of one mess then another time and time again. I suppose it was easier to bail him out and do it themselves than have the patience for him to learn and fix it himself. So when we got together our dysfuctions worked together. Twenty years later I realize that there were dysfuctions and I have realized mine and been on a path to correct mine. In the process we found that he is ADHD and let me tell you that diagnosis really answered many questions from over the years. 

I have come to the conclusion, at least with my ADHD husband, that it's either accept him just like it is, or walk away. He is not going to change, I think that is the bottom line with adhd, you decide that you either accept things how they are or you don't and walk away. You have to let go of expectations. In my marriage, my husband's pros are that he is very supportive of me and what I do, he is affectionate and he wants to do better and in his own slow progress he does try a little.He will do what I ask him to do, pretty consistantly.