Recent forum posts (all topics)

It is too late.

He can perform all the surface changes in the world, but what is beneath is still the person who has done and said so much that's pushed me too far.

Compassion and fear kept me waiting. For years, I bought into the belief that he could not help it. Before I even knew about add and narcissism, I sensed that this is simply how he is.

He can't help it is NOT the same as this is simply how he is. That is the truth with which I am now coming to terms. It hurts. It hurts me for both of us, but he will be fine, continuing to live in the moment.

 

 

 

The train has made an emergency stop, those wishing to stay off exit to station to begin immediately learning healthy tools for change, those wishing to continue on doing same old thing, expecting different result please stay seated.  Please be aware those who are exiting the train, are choosing to still love those who remain seated, and also choose to try a different approach in order to improve their emotional and physical Heath. And that of their family!  

After a long process of learning about and seeing the characteristics of ADHD in our marriage, our family doc has said that he doesn't think my husband has it(he thinks my husband just needs to work less). Initially, it was suggested by my psychologist that he try Dr. Amen's test. The results revealed more than one type of ADHD was present. I stumbled upon this site one day and we downloaded the book. Listening to it is like sheeting our marriage through a looking glass.

Hello - I am new to the forum, and wanted to introduce myself.  I've been in a relationship for nearly two years, and recently moved in with him.  Although, I suspected he may have had ADD (or ADHD - he's not hyperactive), now that I've moved in, I KNOW.  I went to my own counselor yesterday, and she (having a husband that also has ADHD), knew right away, and recommended the book "The ADHD effect on Marriage".  We are not married, but he is a widower, and he has a 10 y/o son, whom I love as my own.  We did not enter into this relationship lightly.

Please tell me how to speak to DH and what words to use where he understands that he is not the only person with feelings?   I feel like I am loosing my mind.  I feel Emotionally abused and my abuser is making himself out to be the victim.  HOW do you respond in a way that ADHD hyper Husband can understand???????  DH demands daily sex, with holds money, shares no details of our finaince, we have had to declare bankrupsy, he gambled,  he has refused to make house payment or car payment, any day now I expect people come foreclose.

I am the ADHD spouse, depression, some PTSD, manipulation and lying issues. I've been kicked out of our house with my son (who's similar to me) and am living in an even more stressful situation right now (my own mother). I feel stressed and dealing with high anxiety about not being with her again. She is simply this, the most amazing, beautiful, and down to earth woman I've ever known. and I've broken my wife's' trust and heart, not an affair physically, but yes one that was emotional. No, I wasn't getting attached emotionally, but affairs don't have to be physical right?

My husband and I have been married for almost 2 years now. It started slow and then we quickly realized we were meant to be and were engaged after 3 months, and married 3 months after that. At the time he was working hard, was super gentlemanly, wanted to step in on my ambitions (I've always been a world traveler- don't expect to stop), and was everything I could have asked for.

We have been together for four years. We argue about petty stuff and he doesn't acknowledge me or my feeling. He tends to misread and misinterpret things I say and I how say it. He doesn't even second guess himself. Instead of talking to me like an adult. He lashes out, acts rude and agrumentive. Even when I'm crying in front of him. I try to tell him my feelings but a lot of time he just keeps interrupting me to tell me excuses or just say nasty things to me. I try to be patient because I know he has ADD/ADHD but I feel like I'm losing my mind.

I am 42, add, wife, suffering from ptsd, with adhd, hyper sex drive, husband and we are Blended family.  We have been on crazy making, circular communication, unable to resolve conflict for 3-4 years now and I have to get off the crazy train.  I have been told that if I would just be a Godly wife, and say yes to sex every time it is requested all, our problems would be solved I just sent my DH this email and was wanting some feedback, Thanks!  excuse spelling LOL!

I open the frig and I see bread and cheese, juice, some sliced meats, eggs, butter, and milk. The cupboards.. soups and oats, tuna and peanut butter, the freeze... Fish and veggies. Not alot, but enough... with options. He looks and sees: "I have no food." Now there are 3 different meats, boxed desserts, freeze bulging with pizzas, and some exotic coffee for me. I like plain coffee, but what does that matter, it looked cool on the shelf. What does it matter? Appearances bring calm and a semblance of normalcy. I stopped cooking ages ago because he only wants his Favorites.