Recent forum posts (all topics)

It has been a while since I posted. I've gotten so much help from this forum. I have been in counseling both with and without my non-add partner (DW) since January of this year. We had 3 sessions together and each one was bad for her, her words. She always came back to the massive hurt and stuff that years of my ADD behavior caused; I've always acknowledged this to her.

I tried posting this poem I wrote before, but it came out in a funky format.  I was able to get it in the forum in the proper form.  I am newly diagnosed with ADHD and have had it my whole life.  I figured out I had it through all the trouble I have had in my marriage.   It really has been a crazy journey learning about ADHD and it's affects.  I am not a poet but this poem came into my head while  I was stuck in traffic.  Not sure why it came out of me, so I figured I would share.  I am typically poor at communicating my feelings to my wife about everything.  When I was able to read this

The Beginning
I met my wife seven years ago. At the time, we worked together at a small locally owned company; she was an RN/Manager and I was the Network Administrator. We quickly became friends and talked frequently. About a year into our friendship we both went through divorces. Soon after we started dating; this was something new for both of us, as neither of us had ever dated a close friend. We fell in love and married pretty quickly. I brought a son from my previous marriage and we soon found out that she was pregnant with her first child and our first together.

  I have been burned out for over 3 years, and don't know WHERE to begin to help myself get better. We had almost 24 undiagnosed years which were chaotic and fast paced due to the hyperactivity, and emotional upheavals because of all the miscommunication and lack of sensitivity, touch, love, etc., then the loss of friends and jobs, with his 3 year affair on top of it all. It burned me out completely, and I feel guilty because I don't have (whatever it is) to get back up and start again. I hate what I see in the mirror and I hate how I feel, and I do want to change, but I'm lost.

I don't know where to start.   I feel like the weight is crushing me.  No one knows, because I keep it all together - I feel like I have to hide everything and fix everything.  I'm scared to walk away - what if it is fixable, and I know that he does really love me....could I be making a huge mistake?  I know that it would devastate him (not a reason to stay, but again, guilty me). 

my boyfriend of a year has all of the qualities i mentioned above.

he also is very focused on me to a point it drives me crazy.

too much of anything is not good..

he is disorganized, messy, his finances in the past were

in total disarray too.

he starts things..doesnt finish them...even at times forgets

where he parks his car!

at night im ready to sleep..he is awake..and watching tv ..loud..

even though he seems tired..he seems sort of wired...or overtired?

I have only been with my ADHD boyfriend for a little over a year now. He has been diagnosed and prescribed medication ever since kindergarten, and to my knowledge his symptoms have not gotten any better with age, although neither have his methods for coping with the negative effects his ADHD has on his life.

So today was the first time I felt totally inadequate. I met the in-laws and went to church with them. I'm not religious and after not seeing him for a week I wAnted some alone time. But when we got back home. He jumped into a book even though he was only There to visit for a hour. Not even a thank you or anything. Even though he has school and only being at my place for an hour. I don't get why that hour was him stuck to the book and not me. After all he knows I'm not religious and hate churches after doing it for him I'd get atleast more appreciation. I'm not used to adhd.

I look in the mirror and what do I see, but 35 year old man who has ADHD Looking back things now it all makes sense As a kid I wasn't slow, stupid or dense School was something I always had to work hard at Listening to things that bored me while fidgeting this way and that I was charismatic and charming and had lots of friends I was crazy and funny willing to make you laugh till no end I guess I coped with this problem not knowing in me was this problem to deal with called ADHD As a young adult I hung out with crazy friends We did insane things that made us wonder how we lived in the end I rea

I'm a new kid here. I figured out that I have ADHD about 9 months ago. I have found a doctor, am on Adderall (little if any effect yet), started a support group for adults since there was only a parents group. I'm 60+ years old. So I have lived for 60+years with untreated ADHD and the H is significant.