Recent forum posts (all topics)

I have ADHD and he has ADHD. Difference is I knew and was able to be trained about it from childhood. While I definitely still have it, I also have the tools to compensate for the most part. 

So when I got home the other day and saw that shoes were placed in the shoebox. I was so happy.

It's a little thing. But when he does things without asking. Especially things he doesn't really want to do. It feels like a win. 

So I am the ADHD spouse, my question is: Does anyone else feel like when they go to bed after a night of arguing, once you wake up its like the night before didn't happen? I need help figuring out what wrong with me. 

I have now tried for months to get my husband (who has known about his ADHD since childhood) to understand we need outside help and our marriage is in danger. I've brought up counseling which he refuses to do because according to him I should be able to talk to him, not some stranger about MY issues. So I tried reading Melissa's book and told him it would be a good idea to read this after I'm done. He's now had it in his possession for 3 weeks and has done nothing but use it as a paper weight.

Hi all.  I'm just feeling so frustrated.  I'm aware of all the symptoms.  I know my spouse has ADHD.  I know his anger is a problem in our marriage and has slowly chipped away at our relationship.  He was just diagnosed in the Spring and he's trying meds but they do NOTHING for his frustration tolerance.  We go for days/weeks with no incident.  And then WHAMMO, I (usually the trigger) say something that sets him off.  And there isn't just anger.  There's sarcastic anger, which is all the more insidious.

I am so discouraged. I try very hard to be supportive and understanding and adapt my life so that things will go well with my ADD spouse. Although I have 20 years of marriage with which to draw thousands of examples, I don't think I need to here. Many people will have lived with what I live with and will not need the anecdotes.

I have been with my current bf for 8 months now, long distance (2 hours away). He was diagnosed with ADHD with some OCD symptoms.  I honestly can accept his certain traits of ADHD, because I grew up with a ADHD brother.  I saw the worst, my brother couldn’t sit quietly in the class and was violent towards his classmate when he was angry.     

I am not married... yet.. but I know my bf who has ADHD plans to ask me to marry him in the coming week and I love him without a doubt and known him for over 5 years, but I am worried about being able to continue handling his ADHD when it has already caused issues, it started out so wonderful he was as i've seen it referred to as "hyperfocused" on me, but now that I have been living with him it is like the newness wore off and I find it harder and harder to get his attention from his computer and phone onto me.

Yes, it's true.  You don't think it gets that hot in Oregon....think again!! LOL  I use to lifeguard in college and I remember these days.  Of course, I could just jump in the water to cool off and get back out again so it wasn't that big a deal with a pool at your disposal? LOL  I remember a day just like this when it hit 106 degrees.  I'm so glad I installed central air in this old house!!  I'm perfectly fine ....I'll be working the late shift tonight when it cools off.

First of all, basics. People with ADHD follow different rules to people without it. You cannot apply the rules you have learnt socially to people with ADHD because they are not ADHD friendly, just like how asking someone without ADHD to work without break or food for very long periods of time is not average-person friendly. This can actually work fine for people with ADHD in hyper focus. When I get into something, my hunger and thirst disappear and they can regularly disappear for an entire day or longer- however long I am in hyper focus.