Recent forum posts (all topics)

Hello all. New hear, been lurking a good while. Short version: Married 24 years. DId not know he was an alcoholic or that he had ADHD back then. Years of dealing w his bad choices, everything from the alcoholism, temper tantrums, many, many jobs, along with the frosting on the cake, infidelity a few years ago. Multiple attempts on my part to engage him in treatment. He is under the care of psychiatrist for depression and ADHD. Well, he gets the pills anyway. Therapy not productive bc of lying to his therapist, as well as our marriage counselor.

Hello everyone, I've just discovered this site and think y'all may be the only ones who will understand where I'm coming from...I hope!

Ok, I finally decided that it may be best for my health and well being to post to a blog in hopes to get some insight from other married couples. I recently married my husband after being together a short year and now we have a baby on the way. 

There is no doubt in my mind that I love him. He means well, he try's and I believe he loves me. 

Are you in a marriage relationship that you and your spouse's differences have made it impossible to achieve the healthy bond you should have? After 9 years I've found it almost impossible to experience a healthy bond. Mostly due to Independence vs Interdependence...Independent living by one or both spouses makes agreements difficult, and it severely limits unity and trust.

I have been married 20 years to my ADHD husband and I had no idea our struggles were due to ADHD! I just thought he was selfish and inattentive.. I just didn't know enough to know they were different types... I recognize us in every single ADHD section of the book... I went through all emotions reading the book, but mostly relived since I have dealt with constant scrutiny that there is something wrong with me and was considering taking anxiety medication in order to stay married.... Sure I have turned into that nagging, untrusting wife ..

I'm accompanying my ADHD partner today for work. Lots of stops for each job and lots of conversations on the phone. 

He speaks to men in a business manner, friendly, more than I'd be, but still on the side of business.

The ladies though, he fully flirts and tells them what he did last night when he got home, told them he'd been on holiday, using words like sweetheart and darling and making connections all over the place.

We have spoken about this before. It's very subtle, but his voice actually changes, deeper, more sexual.

im very very sad. 

So, some background.  DH and I have been together for 20 years.  Married for almost 14 of that.  For all of our relationship we have worked opposite shifts because, well that's just how the jobs go.  Which was fine.

I have been with my ADHD husband for 6 years, married for 2. He was diagnosed about a year into our marriage. We have a 9 month old baby and I am seriously contemplating divorce. 

He has been a lot of fun, and can be very caring. He can also be incredibly selfish, neglectful and aggressive. He has hit me when I was 38 weeks pregnant, threatened to punch me and been verbally abusive. He has no self-esteem and I am in constant battle with his ego. 

What does your ADHD spouse consider a "fun" activity that you do together? My husband has always like going to the movies, I don't. I don't like it because to me, we aren't interacting with each other in any way. We are just sitting there in the dark staring at a really big television screen, and then going home. We haven't talked, interacted, shared anything, played together.......nothing. To me, it's the same as staying home watching television. But, he doesn't like doing anything ELSE.