Recent forum posts (all topics)

Anyone else here feel like friends/family have absolutely no clue what we deal with, or think we are being petty or exaggerating?  I was just talking to a friend who's husband is an alcoholic.  She is trying to get him to go to AA and to get help for depression.  We were talking and it finally dawned on her what I have been going through.  We both realized how similar our situations are.  Until this conversation, I think she thought I was just bitching and moaning about a perfectly nice husband.  I get the impression from family that they think I am really hard on my husband.  He is an incr

If you've noticed a difference with age, do you think this is a truly age only related change, period. Or a change brought about by increased life stress for example or some other change that just happens to have started in later life?

Like many non-ADHDers, I was the subject of hyperfocused dating by my ADHD partner (who I did not know at the time had ADHD). Within a month he said he loved me, wanted me to meet his family, etc.

I'm not really sure where to start here; and I'll keep it as short as I can. My husband and I have been together for almost 10 years now. He had ADHD when I met him and was largely under medicated and completely under treated. A few years ago he made the independent choice to work with his doctor to get medicated in a way that worked for him. Since then we've made great strides together. ADHD has never exactly been the focal point of arguments and tension but it does tend to be lurking in most arguments we have. I bought The Couples Guide to Thriving With ADHD a few months ago.

I don't know if "conflict seeking" is the right way to describe this  or not.

I don't even know if it's his problem, my problem, or a mutual problem.

Basically, every discussion, every disagreement, and every expression of negative emotion on my part--  it all turns into a fight.  Zero to yelling in 10 setconds flat. 

In 16 years, I haven't been able to find a way out. 

If I state my opinion, it's an argument.

If I advocate for my point of view, I'm being controlling and aggressive and it's an argument. 

Hi there, I haven't posted in a while, but I have something I am struggling with on how best to approach my ADHD husband. After years of fighting over impulse purchases, my husband opened a credit card with separate checking account. It is funded with a percentage of any bonus checks he receives from work. It is not the ideal solution for me, but he really likes it and I have to say that we haven't fought since it has been in place for a year. In the past, we fought a lot over his purchases because I thought many of them were unnecessary.

Hi.  I'm new.

My husband is the ADHD spouse, but I don't get to call myself the "NT spouse."

Nope--  I'm the spouse with Level 1 Autism Spectrum Disorder. 

We've been together since 98, married since 01.  Fourteen years next month. 

Hello Everyone,

I just don't know anymore. In some ways I wish he did have ADHD as that would explain the behavior. He told me he was diagnosed with this when he was a kid, but then he also thinks that the government did secret experiments on him when he was in elementary school as well.