Recent forum posts (all topics)

Hey everyone... I had to post this here because I think this may be the only place anyone understands what I'm going thru. My ADHD husband is H-O-R-R-I-B-L-E with money, like many ADDers, but has resisted most attempts on my part to "help" him. He's curbed his huge spending sprees, but still spends about 2x the amount budgeted for him.

My husband has agreed to get an ADHD eval.  We live in the Philly area and I believe we have a number of great resources in this area.  I have a few questions:

I am the non-ADD spouse and have read Melissa's book and two of Dr. Hallowell's books. I have finally convinced my undiagnosed husband to also read about ADHD, but he told me he is unable to read an entire book and needs a shortened article.

 

Anyone out there know of any informative, but brief articles that explain ADHD? If not, then I will try to compile excerpts out of the books for him to review.

When I first met my boyfriend, it was a whirlwind romance.  I was totally swept off my feet. I thought he was intelligent, sweet, charismatic, funny and incredibly talented. He was a graduate student in a science and I was constantly blown away by his creativity and insights. 

I filed for a legal separation four months ago.  I told my husband immediately.  I served him with the papers two months ago.  I asked him to move out of our house temporarily for the autumn (for various reasons, including that our children aren't around, this seemed like a good time to try out a physical separation).  

I've told my husband that my feelings are still mixed about staying together versus splitting; I've told him about the things about the marriage that disappoint me.  

Hi all - 

I don't know where to start... I have so many emotions, thoughts, questions... I can't believe I have been married to my husband for 24 years and know just seriously considered  that what we have experienced through our marriage, but even more importantly what he has experienced himself is ADHD. So much of it makes sense and I feel blindsided, cheated, relieved, regretful ,etc. all at once. He hasn't been diagnosed yet but the experiences described in this site and the book ( the ADHD effect on marriage, which I purchased and am reading) are too close for comfort.

I have been doing pretty well navigating a separation and upcoming divorce from my spouse with untreated ADHD. As we co-parent and are finally on friendly terms after years of strife and dysfunction, I frequently do a balancing act of advocating for what my children and I need and being understanding of my spouse's significant issues. One thing is still pretty tough for me, though, and this week it made me so nuts I had to go drive around in my car and yell with the windows up for a while. 

Hi! First, I want to say how relieved I am to have found this website. I had an argument with my husband last night and I had googled "husband never correctly remembers arguments" and I happened across this site. I am very relieved I am not alone in this or just imagiining things... Some background: we met 2 and a half years ago, and got married last month. He's 28, I'm 30. He was diagnosed with ADD as a child and took ritalin and adderall at various points then. He says they helped somewhat but had other personality side effects he doesn't like.

What do you want in a spouse?  

Dh seems to want sex for his release, my adoration, my respect, laughter, eroticism, cute flirting, freedom to do what he wants the way he wants to do it, no criticism, no discussion other than joking, no talking about finances, someone to take care of finances and to make a home for him, freedom to come and go,  a drinking partner. He just wants us to enjoy ourselves.....in essence, to me, that is singlehood (or boyhood).  This is what I gave him for decades. My mistake.