Recent forum posts (all topics)

We are in financial tight straights at retirement.  dh pays for a warehouse/shop at $6,000/yr. He is not making a profit anymore with it. The majority of the space is storing junk that he doesn't want to see or cope with so he keeps paying the rent instead of clearing it out.  He has taken money out of his small retirement fund to pay for some of this and some other business debt.  I told him to cut the warehouse footage in half at least and get the junk out so he could pay half the rent for it.  He said he would make a call.

I don't even know where to start!  Should I share what my problems are?  Do I share my history with my husband?  How can I help our relationship?  What do I need to know?  What do I need to learn?

I have been married for nearly 13 years.  Things were fine the first year, though my husband would say things like "if I decide we are going to move, we are going to move," and things that showed he felt he was in charge.  He has always been the breadwinner (and a good one), but is extremely tight and controlling with money.  He would frequently tell me what to do or reprimand me for being forgetful.  He often "parented" me-- I remember one time I had set my keys on the bench at church and he hid them in order to teach me a lesson.  He stood there talking to someone while I looked frantical

OK, so here I am, after all the craziness you may have read before(from "When You Have Been Hurt so Many Times", and in my mind, I had decided to leave, but had not gone through with it yet. One day, I was paying some bills, and he made a scathing remark about how we would not have to worry about money for bills if I had a "real job." This is after I just finished my second job, and he had not bothered to get the full-time job he had promised to.

Hi....my husband and I have been married for 8 years and it has not been an easy road.  I knew he had ADD when we got married but never really understood or realized the severity of it until we had our daughter two years ago.  As soon as we came home from the hospital I was basically alone with her day and night and it was exhausting physically and emotionally. I needed his help....but he was unable to give it (saying that "his challenges" make it hard to do the things I need....which wasn't much to begin with).

I am a 25yo woman married to a man with ADD (he calls it ADD because he does not have the hyperactivity component). He was diagnosed as a child but did not start taking medication until college. We have been married for almost 2 years and our marriage is overall very happy. However, there is an issue in our relationship that has really taken a toll on both of us. Since I am new to this site, I am not sure if this problem has to do with ADD. So, I am wondering how much can be attributed to ADD and how much is my fault.

I read this site alot. Recently, things keep swinging wildly for my DH and i between great/silent (silence is better for us at this point, at least it means we arent fighting/treating the other poorly) and bickering/fighting. 

I havent been on here in a while but I think I am going to have to get out of this relationship.  My hurts are told to him again and again about every 3 months (because i am not seeing change) , and last night it all came out AGAIN.  I explained to him that the three things are 1. Lack of intimacy 2. He is not meeting his commitments for debt 3. he has not kept promises to me.

These three things by themselves would not be so bad but when they are all together concurrently, it is a big alarm bell for me and I am sad, hurt and scared. 

I know this isn't a new topic--I literally just stumbled upon this blog looking for help in a completely different area!  I'm completely ASTONISHED that I never before put the behaviors on the ADHD!  I've been with K for 6 years and ever since we moved in together I have wondered if I was in an abusive relationship.  He's a hard-core stoner as well, which as you can imagine may make him feel like he feels better, but it does nothing for our relationship.  We were supposed to get married this week and I called it off because the fighting from planning got ridiculous.  I'm so tired of feeling

Today I am sitting with my own life's reality.  Reading the posts here on this forum, knowing I am not the only one who has done what I did to keep my marriage.

What I have been fighting for close to 10 years is that inner voice that says, "I want out.  I want out out.  I want Out.  Get out.  Get out.  Get out.  My marriage is dead.  My marriage is dead.  My marriage is dead."