Recent forum posts (all topics)

Hi to everyone...I am new to this site. A few months ago I began a blog on blogspot called waiting for the breakthrough (I don't think even 1 person has gone to it yet!) to help me deal with what I thought was my H's workaholism. We've been together 20 yrs and It's been up and down. H is a decent guy in that he is not abusive or mean. In fact, he can be too nice - saying yes when he means no, making promises he does not keep, etc. He promises the world and then forgets about it.

So, not quite sure how to start this, or what I want to ask or say, but maybe it will just materialize out of my thoughts... I am the non, DH is clearly trying. There are so many things that are happening that you would think would help, but then something happens and I go two steps back. I have made it abundantly clear that there are certain behaviors that will set us back, and DH has made huge strides in this area. I do appreciate it, and have even gone so far to say if you do this behavior, I don't want to know about it and if you do DECIDE to do it, then don't come near me.

I started coming here after I began a quick google search for an online support group for spouses with adhd. I have been reading for about 2 weeks now and finally decided to register. Sadly I have no drive in me left to type out all that I have been through in the past 13 years. Seriously it is written throughout this board! I can start with me and what I feel is my part in this whole mess. I believe I am the non~adhd'er even though I am the one in counseling and in the past taken medication. I have seen a psychiatrist who dx me with a "mood disorder". Im fine with that.

I've been coming to this site for some time trying to find help in coping with and understanding my partner, who was diagnosed with ADD as a child and whom I'm certain has a pretty bad case of ADHD. Yet she thinks it's a bunch of phooey so won't get help. Our relationship is a lot like others I read on here.

My husband was diagnosed with ADHD about a month and a half ago. I had performed some research on ADHD and realized how it was always there from the day we got married, had our child and present day.  He is taking Adderall and it took awhile for him to get the right amount but it seems it has stabilized him. 

I do not know how to focus on what makes me happy, and living my life, and maintaining loving behavior. Truly, I have been at this a very, very long time. After 2 more 'forgettings' about spending time and attention on our non-existent sex life, I chose not to bring it up, but feel frozen inside. My husband acts as if everything is the same, NEVER addresses any negative issues, and continues on being affection with his loving words. But,  has even stepped it up a notch, which lets me know that he is aware that all is not well.

My husband moved out of the house over a year ago and has communicated very little with our children since then.  Calls them very little and sees them only once a year.  Doesn't even ask me how they are doing.  Is there anyone else out there that has experienced this same thing?  I cannot understand how a parent can do this to their children.    

Hi there

Although we have been at the point of divorce many times before, I believe I will go through with it this time. I am completely burned out and am tired of his ADHD and depression. I need to get on with my life! He is very angry and refuses to leave our home. I am willing to compensate him fairly for this, however, he is very angry (as usual)! I live in NJ. Anyone have any advice? Do I wait for his anger to subside? Do I see a lawyer and be aggressive? I was hoping to do this civilly thru a mediator. I want our divorce to be more dignified than our marriage....

Every once in a while when I'm feeling really down I look at this site thinking I will find some hope.  Instead I end up feeling even more discouraged.  Even in the 'hopeful' forum - it's all about being hopeful that the ADHD spouse will change and 'get better' and live up to the non-adhd spouse's expectations.  I read how everyone is at their wits end with their spouse and can't take it anymore.  Or how the adhd spouse is making progress but it's such a small step.