Recent forum posts (all topics)

So ok, I have ADHD - not too bad, but still.  I know that I start and don't finish, I skip around subjects, etc.  And at some point, love isn't enough to save you.

1 thing - not sharing the load with housework.  Sure, I understand that in principal.  We both live here, there are 2 children (10 & 6), and there's plenty to be done.

I just finished reading a new book by Katherine Ellison - "Buzz: A Year of Paying Attention"

My husband has happily worked for almost 3 years in a private, government-funded mental health company. He was a peer specialist, which means he has to have a diagnosed mental illness and be successfully treating it. He's had problems with notes, losing cell phones, getting lost (all things associated with ADD). But he was late yesterday because I lost my purse which had his keys in it. He told his boss the truth and today he got fired for it.

As I continue to read about ADHD there is a lot of focus on inconsistency- but to me this seems like an extremely vague reference. Does it apply to everything or is it primarily applicable to task completion or forgetfulness. Is it a matter of saying one thing and doing another (ie- lets go to the movies, but when you leave the house you are headed in a completely different direction actually going away from the movie theater?).

My husband use to be very affectionate. All while we were dating, and engaged and for a while in our marriage. During the past year he has become less and less affectionate. When I asked him about it, and explained how important it is to me, he said that he can't really be that way anymore because of his ADD. I asked him why he had no problem holding me before bed, or cuddling with me before. He said that he was never able to sleep or relax, and that it was always this way.. he just hid it. I try to be understanding and put it into perspective, but I find myself being hurt a lot.

I am new to this forum. When I read so many of the posts, I felt a lot of relief. It was as if I was reading a mirror image of our life.  What I don't understand is why people with ADD or ADHD can't see the havoc they are causing.  The tension in our house is ridiculous. He is terrible at doing household chores and admittedly I am worn to the nub. The frustration level with my spouse is hitting an all time high. Tempers are flaring. My parents, who live with us due to my Mother's disability, are fed up with his behaviour.

I have been married to my ADHD husband for 5 years, and we have no children.  More and more lately I have been fantasizing about just asking for a divorce and throwing in the towel.  The main reason I haven't yet is because I'm terrified of the whole "grass is always greener" situation where I will regret doing this (as divorce should be an absolute last resort).

Had a job interview this morning for a job that would be perfect for me.  Only part time - but it will definitely lead to many more things if I get it.

The most encouraging thing about THIS interview though, as opposed to past interviews I've had is that i did NOT get off track and talk too much and go off on an unrelated, out of control tangent.  I did NOT interrupt anyone, I did NOT fidget and I was 5 minutes early.

So, even if I don't actually get the job, I count this as a victory!

The other day I told my husband a new plan I had for finding a job.  He thought it was a great idea, but I could tell he was skeptical about the chance of me actually following through.

He was visibly stunned about an hour ago when I got off the phone and said, "I've got an interview tomorrow morning!"

Yay!

My husband and I have only been married less than a year and we are in a sad state. We had a whirlwind romance after being friends for a year and we were completely enamored with eachother. I know we have what it takes to be the couple married for fifty years embarrassing their grandkids with their PDA. Things started off badly for us though. He was all the things described in the books: caring, spontaneous, funny, loyal. But we soon found ourselves in big trouble. He developed a premature ejaculation problem, and would apologize but immediately fall asleep.