Recent forum posts (all topics)

So I've left my possible ADD and definitely Bipolar boyfriend behind.

I'm not sure what came first but the symptoms were so close I wonder if there is a distinct different in terms of recovery. It is unlikely that we will get back together even after he's started recovery as he is an alcoholic. The doctor evaluting him asked if he wanted to continue a love relationship with me and he said he didn't know. It's hard to accept after all the support I've given him and the fact that we have been friends for over 20 years.

I will try to keep this simple. I'm too exhausted to write much. How do I withstand the constant barrage of ideas and brainstorms, and all of the relentless negotiation he pursues with me to try to get me to agree that it, (whatever "it" might be) is a great idea, and i should be on board.

I am fairly new to this site.   I have read numerous posts from Non-ADHD spouses commenting on the lack of sex or interest in sex from their ADHD spouse.  I have the opposite situation.

I need advice for how to handle a financial issue that seems to continue in our marriage.  My husband did not have his taxes deducted from his unemployment checks 3 years ago and the IRS is now wanting to collect.  I tried filling out non-obligated spouse forms hoping that I would not have to be responsible for his debt.  I found out that you pretty much have to be divorced to not be held responsible.  My husband does not see paying the IRS as a high priority and has not followed through with the payment arrangement he set up with the IRS.  I also had him sign an agreement with me saying he

I'm one of those apparent rarities; a husband with an ADHD wife (perhaps because husbands typically spend less time researching relationships than wives do).

What I am finding to be unfailingly true in my relationship with my ADHD husband is that you have GOT to learn to be adaptable--if nothing else.  I have had a hard time coming to terms with that and I have spent the better part of my marriage so far being uptight and worrying and freaking out about every little thing that didn't go the way I planned.  I have been a constant nervous wreck until recently.  Now I am learning to relax and take things as they come, and with a grain of salt when I can.  I try to have a sense of humor when my husband does or says something crazy instead of blowing

I just need to vent for a second . . . I am so tired of hubby referring to every conversation he can't recall or remembers incorrectly as a "miscommunication." It makes me feel like he's saying there was something wrong with the way I communicated something, and most of the time there isn't. We'll have a conversation, make a plan, whatever an be on the same page. We're even in the habit now of having him say an outline of the plan or conversation to help cement it for him.

My husband has (yet) undiagnosed ADD.  It's been 4 weeks since I handed him a list of symptoms and asked him what he thought...  This past year has been awful.  I believe that his ADD was masked as laziness until then but the changes and difficulties we've faced in this year and especially him being without regular work have really brought it out.  If we didn't have children (a toddler and one on the way) I would have probably left already.  When I started researching ADD I was actually quite excited.  I had tried all sorts of things to improve our marriage but nothing seemed to work and I

I've been thinking about forgiveness in ADD/HD relationships. My ADD spouse won't apologize about anything and yet insists that I have to forgive him which (sigh!) I always do. Over and over again... I'm finding, the need to protect myself somehow and choose to avoid conversations and situations that could provide yet another opportunity to forgive. I have to be very careful about what I say to avoid an angry retort. When he is angry, I try my best to respond and not react. This strategy is helpful but I cannot just relax and be myself. Forget social gatherings!

In my 3 years of being married to an ADHD spouse, I must constantly remind myself that I CANNOT compare my husband to other people and wonder why he doesn't match up.  Not only is he an individual, but trying to compare him to other non-adhd husbands is like trying to fit a square peg in a round hole--won't work.  I can push and push and try to get him to change and ask him why he can't be "round" like everyone else, but he is a special person.  I'm not saying that there aren't things that he needs to work on...by any means!  But I have found myself unfairly comparing him to other people an