Fresh Start


ADHD & Marriage - Weekly Marriage Tip - November 20, 2013

Heart to Heart

Tips for Thriving in your Marriage

Quote of the WeekQuick Links

I like hiring (inexperienced engineers because they are) unsullied.  I want people to think they are pioneering something.  I want us all to be fresh, know nothing and be willing to experiment on something new.  I’m very keen on wrong thinking.”

- Inventor James Dyson



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Being Fresh

I laughed out loud when I read this, trying to imagine a speech in which he says “I’m very keen on wrong thinking” in a sort of British accent…!  Lovely!  But think about the idea – fresh thinking brings creative new ideas.  When I work with couples I encourage them to have an “old relationship” and a “new relationship.”  The latter is the one that starts after they’ve found out about ADHD and learned new things about it from my book and from starting to work on their relationship in new ways.  The reason I do this is I want them to think of their new tools as an opportunity for a fresh start.  To try things that haven’t worked in the past in a new way that reflects their new understanding…to be open to experimenting with fresh (maybe weird) ideas.  That’s SO much better than bringing your past hurts forward and assuming you’ll continue to fail because you have in the past!

Surely if Dyson had started from “we can’t do this” we would never have a vacuum that rolls on a big ball…

For those in marriages impacted by ADHD
If you or your spouse has ADHD, please join our forum at to ask your questions and learn from others who share your issues.  In addition, you'll find in-depth essays and a terrific recorded in-depth seminar to help you learn how to thrive in a marriage affected by ADHD.
Hope to hear from you there!
Melissa Orlov

© 2013 Melissa Orlov