Recent forum posts (all topics)

Long-distance relationship sucks, I know. But what the hell??

As the significant other of a man with ADD and Depression, I am always trying to figure out what might be done to modify the explosiveness of the relationship.

I have the same problems many have...which include all the requisite accusations: "I wouldn't be angry if you didn't____________"; "The reason I can't get anything done is because you __________"; "If you would just give me a chance I could accomplish _____________";..... on and on and on... In reading this forum we all seem to share the same life.

I've been at odds with my husband pretty much since we got married 6 years ago. I would ask him to help me out and take care of something and later he would say he forgot or ran out of time when he had 4 hours to complete the task and didn't even start it. I've caught him multiple times having inappropriate conversations with random women online. No matter how I told him it hurt me, I would still catch him. He now says the sites have been deleted, we'll see. A little over 3 years ago my daughter was born and everything escalated.

I'm 32 and dating a 25 year old male with ADD/ADHD.  I have never experienced a relationship like this, soo hard to be with someone who has this disorder.  He was diagnosed young and is prescribed medication but does not take it.  In the beginning there was just something about him that was great....there still is.  To me he's different and theres just something there. We moved really fast in the beginning, started dating and then he proposed.

This post is aimed at people in long term ADHD marriages. People who likely have children together, who feel that their spouse is an incredibly beautiful person but for the ADHD behaviors, and people who love their ADHD spouse and absolutely hate the fights.

There's a lot of great information on ADHD online but nothing I ever read told me the absolute truth. I only learned the real truth when my ADHD wife of ten years told me that she wanted to separate from me over another of many fights over money. We have two amazing boys together, one of whom also has ADHD.

I moved this comment I made previously as to my own feelings of why my wife does what she does.  I could not wrap my head around her behavior and the motivation that I was seeing as quite obvious to me....as self sabotaging both herself....Me......and us together at the same time.

I wasn't sure whether to put this in communication or Hope and Progress but as I see......this is a huge step forward and making progress but it did come through communicating some things to wife....including the possibility of her having ADHD?  She actually took the initiative to take some on line tests that put her in the "possible" category which was no surprise to me. However....that;'s not what this break through is all about (but related....emotional lability?  Thinking it is?  In part )

Is it just me who sometimes really cannot be bothered to deal with my partners out of control symptons? 

I know his meds are not working, I know he's not working on anything much, he's unfocused, forgetful, vague, lying over stupid things, obsessed with a game on his phone, forgetting plans we have made, speaking to me like crap, off on another planet....

My husband won't address his ADHD issues. He used to say he didn't have ADHD and/or it simply didn't exist and was a madeup diagnosis. He's come around a pretty good amount I guess. This past year after losing something the umpteenth time he asked me "so what would I have to do to get ADHD meds?" Nonetheless I feel that he thinks that acknowledging and treating this problem is admitting that he's the "problem" in our marriage or something.

My H - who went off and started doing some amazing things for 2 weeks, has started loosing steam I believe.  Like other times - this seems to be starting his loss of motivation etc.  I hope I am wrong, but I doubt it.