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Hi everyone, (Sorry for any grammatical errors, English is not my native language) 

 So my girlfriend has ADHD and we've been together for around 9 months now. Altough I am happy with her, there are a few things which really bother me and I'm not sure if it's her ADHD, or the way she is. 

 

Something that happened today is a good example of a thing that's really annoying me:

Question? What else can I do to break the "mothering" trap?

Right now, I don't pick up his clothes on the floor, I don't carry his dishes to the dishwasher, I am not putting his clothes in the hamper so they aren't getting washed by me because they aren't in the proper place and I am not mentioning it. I am not reminding him to do anything. Just flat out not mentioning it.

What else should I be doing?

I was reading an article on Yahoo Health, with quotes from Melissa Orlov.    I have read this information before, heard this before, and in my experience have been trying to align it with my marriage.

"One of the most common patterns in an ADHD relationship is that one partner does a disproportionate amount of work in the household, because it’s equally difficult for people with the disorder to initiate tasks and to complete them. One partner is always nagging; the other is always defensive.'

I filed for divorce in December. My husband's communication style (rarely calling or emailing, rarely responding to messages) while at his parents' home, being their caregiver, was a big, although not the only, factor leading me to decide to file for divorce. His withdrawal, emotionally, physically, and financially, from the marriage is the prime cause. Since the filing, the communication has become even less existent; he responded to one message, about a malfunctioning appliance, and that is it.

http://mustbethistalltoride.com/2016/01/14/she-divorced-me-because-i-lef...

Anyone know of an inpatient/residential ADHD treatment program for adults in the U.S. that they would recommend? There seems to be a fair number of clinics that offer the programs and I need to narrow it down....

As I was reading up on this concept of "Safeguarding"......it immediately resonated with me. Not to assume that everyone will have this same experience.... but for those who don't....I think there is a direct relationship to this in terms of "physiological motivation"....which helps explain the "why" in peoples behavior and the motivation behind it.

Hello All,

My first post was about 9 years ago. I had just met my soon-to-be husband and began the process of eagerly immersing myself in "all that is ADD".

It's been nearly 9 years, and we're still married.

I love him dearly, yet can absolutely relate to NEARLY every heart-wrenching post.

I have some questions. I'm 24, and was just diagnosed with ADHD. I know that therapy takes time, and I'm working on it, but I had a few questions/was looking for some advice. For as long as I can remember, I have lied when I either forgot something or when I was asked about an impulsive action. I don't mean to, but I think that the constant shame I feel over constantly feeling like a disappointment to my family and my fiancee is the root cause of it. I've felt that way for as long as I can remember, and now I have a problem with impulsively lying.

I am at this place of wanting to do something in a different way. I am inspired by that old saying - "If you always do - what you always did - you always get - what you always got."