A difficult afternoon at home
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My spouse of 12 yrs ( known for 14 though) has ADHD. He has that and Bipolar II and OCD. Yes quite a powerful mix. I am not unscathed though I have Bipolar type A or I. I seem to deal much easier with my illness, when he struggles even with medication. Now on the whole he is nice guy, intelligent guy and he treats me well for the most part.
Hi everyone this is my first post here and I am seriously soooo excited to be here. I've been reading a lot of people's posts and oh my can I relate! My hubby was diagnosed with ADHD as a child and now years later I think it still really affects him. We've been married for almost 2 years with a 10 month old and I am so about ready to throw in the towel. One of the main issues is money and his stupid, STUPID car..
So I have been talking with my counselor a BUNCH lately about the idea of acceptance. After 20 years of being the responsible one while ADHD hubby gets to do pretty much whatever pleases him at the moment, I am negative and spent and exhausted-like many of us are. But we cannot afford a divorce and we have two kids. Right now my plan is to suck it up until the now 8th grader graduates from high school and then RUN as fast as I can. In the meantime, my counselor has me working on getting to a place of acceptance. I know this is best for me.
How many of us started off just wanting to love our spouses unconditionally? This is a good thing, but, I just didn't know all the different faces of Love...Nor did I know how to recognize fake spirits that showed pleasing attributes, and influenced me to say it's Love. My perception, was skewed because of my own neediness, and my own spiritual immaturity.
My boyfriend is on medication for ADHD...has been for years, so I knew he carried the diagnosis before we began dating. I didn't, however, realize that it would have such an affect on me and our relationship. Or I guess that's one reason I'm here...to see IF that is a reason for the struggles we face, or if the two things are completely unrelated.
I am a non-ADHD spouse married to an ADHD man, we have had our share of issues but I am wondering how I can better keep the peace. I am currently a graduate student & mother to 3 under 7yrs old. My husband feels no need to help lessen the load on me and it seems as if his interest is everything but our household.
I am a non-ADHD spouse married to an ADHD man, we have had our share of issues but I am wondering how I can better keep the peace. I am currently a graduate student & mother to 3 under 7yrs old. My husband feels no need to help lessen the load on me and it seems as if his interest is everything but our household.
"Most women subconsciously gravitate towards men who accord her the same level – or lack – of value and empathy our fathers did. So if your father neglected to let you know how special and valuable you are, you may attract similar relationships with men in your adult life, unaware that you deserve better." Psychologist Dr Linda Nielsen
I was moved to write this:
"The tears mean something", he said.
"Oh, they are nothing. I had a good childhood."