Recent forum posts (all topics)

i feel he has gone too far and im really hurt

He is the love of my life. He once made me feel like I was the only girl alive. But a little after a year of us being together I found out he love's porn.and I was open to it and still am.but after a while he started talking about some of my girlfriends and ones my sister and even some others we know. After a few times he seen I got out of the mood as soon as he brought it up. I let him know it really hurt my feelings and didn't like talking about people we know and I was really nice about it. But its been almost 2years and he still does it.

Broken Promises vs. Lies

I've had a particularly difficult day today. ADHD BF is out of town for a work project. I woke up early to get a jump on my day and had NO INTERNET. Because BF didn't pay the bill and it is more than TWO months overdue. And because my entire business is online, I was screwed.

I had mentioned the overdue internet bill to BF several times in recent months and he repeatedly told me, "I'll take care of it" and "Don't worry." At one point in April, he told me that he had "Contacted them and worked out a plan."

Really? Seems like not so much.

Is this the end of us?

My husband and I have been together for 13 years.  Married for 7.  We have two young children.  My husband has ADD and his drug and alcohol problems started when he was a teenager.  He was started on Adderall just before we got married.  He told me he stopped taking it when we started trying to get pregnant, but he never did.  He was abusing it.  He convinced his doctor that he needed higher and high doses.  He was buying extra from people.  I suspected that he had a drug problem for years but he would never admit to it and I could never prove it.  Three years of lies and sneaking around. 

Why do I stay?

I have been pondering this question someone posted to me on this site. I don't know the answer.  I know I am paralyzingly scared and that I have always been someone who accomodates people trying to play on a team.  But what do people do to garner enough fortitude to make the necessary changes and withstand the war of the roses that will affect our own children and grandchildren.  How do people know what to do?  

Husband's mood changed in an instant!

We were away this holiday weekend at the motorcycle track for H's racing. He was so excited to have both me and his daughter there. I always hate the beginning and end of these weekends where packing and unpacking and setting up is involved. I can never "get it right". If I move something, it's wrong. If I don't help because I know it's not going to be right enough, he gets upset that I'm not doing anything. I basically can't win. Well the packing and then the set up went fine and even the packing up leaving the track went fine.

Need advice from those with years with this to give perspective

I have been reading a lot on this forum lately, finished Melissa's book and have been to two therapists for myself.  I posted the issue about my husband's difficulty with parenting tasks and his possible ADHD.  I've tried to get him to his doctor to get evaluated (won't go) and tried to get us into marital counselling (he keeps telling me"Let's just try this and if it doesn't work we'll go", but I know he is very resistant to going).  The problems are definitely starting to affect our 3 year old.

First time

This is my first time posting to any forum like this regarding my husbands adhd. I am curious if anyone has experienced a husband who hyper focuses on a business that seems to consume him. He can't hold down a steady job because he is convinced that this business is the end all be all (we will be debt free, I will be happier, etc.). We have been married for 10 years now and I am pretty numb. The job changes, increases in debt, cross country moves, and general instability have taken their toll on me.

He runs off to a nice movie

He is obsessed with movies and his fantasy life and resents me and our daughter for getting in the way of his enjoyment and freedom. He wanted to go see X Men on Friday and hey, I would like to see it actually (he knows I've seen all the other ones) but he didn't ask if I wanted to or try to make a "date" or anything, he just asked hey would you mind if *I* go see the new X Men and I said well it is late already and I wasn't too keen on that at the time. Plus I mean, hey I want to see it as well so like thanks for thinking of me, right?

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