Recent forum posts (all topics)

Why do I stay?

I have been pondering this question someone posted to me on this site. I don't know the answer.  I know I am paralyzingly scared and that I have always been someone who accomodates people trying to play on a team.  But what do people do to garner enough fortitude to make the necessary changes and withstand the war of the roses that will affect our own children and grandchildren.  How do people know what to do?  

Husband's mood changed in an instant!

We were away this holiday weekend at the motorcycle track for H's racing. He was so excited to have both me and his daughter there. I always hate the beginning and end of these weekends where packing and unpacking and setting up is involved. I can never "get it right". If I move something, it's wrong. If I don't help because I know it's not going to be right enough, he gets upset that I'm not doing anything. I basically can't win. Well the packing and then the set up went fine and even the packing up leaving the track went fine.

Need advice from those with years with this to give perspective

I have been reading a lot on this forum lately, finished Melissa's book and have been to two therapists for myself.  I posted the issue about my husband's difficulty with parenting tasks and his possible ADHD.  I've tried to get him to his doctor to get evaluated (won't go) and tried to get us into marital counselling (he keeps telling me"Let's just try this and if it doesn't work we'll go", but I know he is very resistant to going).  The problems are definitely starting to affect our 3 year old.

First time

This is my first time posting to any forum like this regarding my husbands adhd. I am curious if anyone has experienced a husband who hyper focuses on a business that seems to consume him. He can't hold down a steady job because he is convinced that this business is the end all be all (we will be debt free, I will be happier, etc.). We have been married for 10 years now and I am pretty numb. The job changes, increases in debt, cross country moves, and general instability have taken their toll on me.

He runs off to a nice movie

He is obsessed with movies and his fantasy life and resents me and our daughter for getting in the way of his enjoyment and freedom. He wanted to go see X Men on Friday and hey, I would like to see it actually (he knows I've seen all the other ones) but he didn't ask if I wanted to or try to make a "date" or anything, he just asked hey would you mind if *I* go see the new X Men and I said well it is late already and I wasn't too keen on that at the time. Plus I mean, hey I want to see it as well so like thanks for thinking of me, right?

***THE SLUG BOX *** THREAD - PART 2 - drop off your slugs here

MELISSA, the original Slug Box thread is very long now. May we start a continuation thread? If not, please have your WebAdmin remove it, thank you.

Again, this is a continuation of THE SLUG BOX thread for both AD/HD and non-AD/HD persons to drop off their "slugs". Ideally a line or two.  

Time blindness, do you feel the effects?

It was 9:30 pm.  I was watching TV.  My spouse came home, walked into the living room and asked, "Do you want something for supper?  I'm going to grill some hamburgers."

Sure frustrated the heck out of me.  9:30 at night.  I just responded, "No thanks.  I've already eaten."  Bubbling up in me was the boiling sarcasm: "Um, NO.  Dinner time is between 5:30 and 6:30."  I had lost a majority of these battles over the past 20+ years, and gave up the ghost on the war.    

The doors flew open today !

Today was our first visit with a 2nd LMHC, in this new cycle of 'seeing someone' to try to find ourselves a path to improve our relationship, and immediately this counselor heard the familiar complaints of ADHD-affected marriages.  She began finishing our sentences for us!  I could not believe it! My wife was excited that here was a person who could relate.  Someone who seemed to know her mind (my wife's), yet we only just met.  

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