Recent forum posts (all topics)

Hi folks,

I'm the ADHD husband. I just got diagnosed and on meds in March of this year. I also am bi-polar 1 and have been on meds for the past 18 or so months.

My focus and energy are better and I'm seeing the needle move on some behavior stuff and others I still struggle with. 

First Post

Summer Holiday with ADHD spouse

Parent Child Dynamic 

Enabling Dynamic

Hello,

My husband of many years has been talking for decades about what he's going to do with his life.

Hey community, I really really need you all right now. I'm so angry typing this out because I'm about to explode. 

My husband is DX non-medicated (by choice, he refuses meds and therapy. I've been in solo therapy myself for several years). I've commented/posted here before, but feeling quite down with recent conflicts. Separation is not an option because I do love him and I refuse to lose my kid 50% of the time. Posting here to seek fellowship and maybe some ways to consider and approach our conflicts. I also want to emphasize that he is not an abuser per-say, but his behavior is abusive, if that makes sense.

Hi folks,

I'm the ADHD spouse and after reading the comments in this forum I can see myself in many of them. I'm also bi-polar. For most of our marriage I did not know why I was acting the way I was and a diagnosis and meds were not the magic bullets I thought they would be. I'm as frustrated and angry at my ADHD as my wife is and am deeply ashamed and guilty over my actions. 
 

I've asked her what would mean the most to her as far as change goes and she has told me to do the work and figure it out. I want to do better at meeting her needs and am hesitant to try or start because of her anger. She's told me I'm a low level thinker. So to that end I'd like to ask folks smarter than me and who have walked this road: 

Without being weird or awkward or over sharing - how did your ADHD spouse show they were serious about change? I'm in therapy with a psychologist who understands ADHD. I'm also working with a faith based counselor. I'm taking my meds. 
 

To be transparent - I've withdrawn because of the hurt I felt over the comment regarding my intelligence. I've focused more on the garden, a sore point for years, than her. I feel very awkward and weird around her. I'm working on not being defensive but im not speaking much at all. 
 

Any tips are appreciated! Also, if you have any constructive criticism that will help me sharpen my behavior and support my wife that's also appreciated. 
 

thank you

QM

Since a recent ADHD diagnosis my husband's whole perspective on life abs what he wants has changed and I'm currently in limbo waiting to find out if he wants a divorce or not. 

It's a relief to find this community and read the shared experiences. Being the partner of a ADHD spouse can be a really lonely experience. I find It's a constant  battle of trying to understand and empathise and standing up for yourself and the respect you deserve. 
May question. What are the stories of hope, what has worked and is it worth it to hang in there? 

I'm exhausted and don't know what to do. Please seeking advice and guidance. Apologies for the lengthy post. 

Me (28 y/o F) and my fiance (29 y/o M) have been together since about 2015 and got engaged in Summer 2022.   He has an ADHD diagnosis since he was a child.  Currently un-medicated.  As of 2021 he has discussed his feelings of depression and anxiety with me. (I've encouraged therapy and professional help on multiple occasions but he refuses).  Since getting engaged we're not getting along and I feel like I'm losing my sanity.