We seem to have gotten to polar opposites of fun/work linear scale. My married life has been about building, maintaining, planning, working. DH has been about having fun, being personable, sense of humor, talking his way around things, jokes, his own pleasure experience. I slid into workathon when I thought that if he saw me have fun, he would get distracted and think he deserved more fun that he is already having (he has a distorted sense of what is fair) and he would abandon his work and promises and have only fun abandoning more of his share of work.