Recent forum posts (all topics)

Separation and Getting Back Together (looking for people's experience)

I'm the wife and my husband has ADHD.  We've been separated for a year and over the last few months I've let go of the anger and have allowed myself to feel compassion for him and love him again thru all the hurt he put me thru.  I was pretty much ending the marriage but I do love him and in one aspect I do NOT want to regret NOT giving him a second chance BUT in the same respect, I do NOT want to have those regrets of giving him a second chance IF he hurts me again.  I do want to mention that he was very verbally and emotionally abusive and life was a rollercoaster.  

Adhd or not: losing perspective as to when to give up

Yes my spouse has add. Yes he is taking a med which can give him a weird flat affect sometimes. We've gone to counseling and it just made him angrier. He states more often about how he does not love me, but then will say it back to me if I say it first. I do love him - after almost 30 years. So do the kids, and he they. But over the last couple of years, It seems that with this new diagnosis of adhd, his symptoms have gotten way worse as has his anger impulsivity. He has not done it recently but his physical aggression agst me has gotten worse.

very conflicted

I need some advice.  I am feeling so conflicted.   Let me give you a little history.  I have been married to an ADHD spouse for 13 years.  He takes his medicine when he wants to trying to ration it out knowing that I have said it is a non-negotiable for him to take it.  He spends a lot of time, I feel like, self medicating with alcohol.  Alcohol is a big issue in our relationship.  It always has been.  I don't like how much he drinks, and he refuses to quit.   On top of that, he has an incontinence issue when he drinks so he wets the bed or on the couch and generally I am left with the me

Violence towards children from ADD Wife

Hi - I'm new here, seeking advice and support on how to deal with violence from my Spouse who a social worker I spoke to thinks is likely ADD.

My wife goes back and forth from being a reasonable patient person to one who speaks in very mean tone and language to the children and at times will hit them.  

I reached my bottom a few days ago after she hit our 7 year old daughter on the back.  I'm against any hitting and in this case, it didn't seem to me that my daughter did anything wrong, just a misinterpretation from my wife.

Is this normal?

When you and your spouse had any sort of long distance between you for a certain length of time, was it common to go days without hearing one thing from them? Then they finally get in contact with you after those few days and act like nothing is wrong...and then they go more days without contact and so on?

Non-ADD partner has lost interest in sex

I've noted a wide variety of posts on this website expressing frustration with sexual intimacy when one partner has ADD.  Most of these seem to fall into two categories.  1) The ADD spouse is so easily distracted that you can't get them to begin sexual intimacy and/or stay engaged after they begin,  2) The ADD spouse (always male in this situation, as far as I've noticed) is such a novelty junkie that he spends a tremendous amount of time on pornography, leaving his wife sexually frustrated, humiliated, and/or disgusted.

Non ADHD dealing with undiagnosed partner

my partner and i have been together 2 years and though he is undiagnosed, he's open to considering that he has adhd and thinks it likely.  the thing is he's not doing anything about it! moving forward is nearly impossible right now - he seems frozen and unable to deal with it.  in the mean time i'm exhausted from trying to get through day to day... carrying the responsibility of everything and falling into the parent/child roles...

Symptoms for Women with ADHD

I am new to ADHD (I'm the non-ADHDer and I believe my husband has ADHD).  I also think his mother is either ADD or ADHD, but I can't seem to find anything about what symptoms women typically have when they are ADHD.  At this point it is not going to help my relationship with her but I am the type of person that needs to understand why things are the way they are and why my husband is the way he is.  I think once he can accept the reality of what is happening to him and maybe understand the "why" as well it will be easier for him to cope.  I also think if I knew that his mother had ADD/ADH

Runaway ADHD Groom

After almost a decade of being together, buying a house, starting our family with our dogs, and three unsuccessful attempts at getting married, we have finally decided to deal with our issues first. Though he is the one that called off the wedding because of the work we have to do in our relationship, I understand and support him in the decision. I am devastated that we are not getting married even though everything was planned and set to go (he called it off within a week and a half from the big day). I am an over achiever, very controlling, and a perfectionist.

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