Recent forum posts (all topics)

I have recently found out that I have ADHD, Now to make a long story short I am deployed to Iraq and had some marriage problems, digging it out of my wife I found out she was thinking about leaving me when I returned, that she was not happy and has not been happy for a long time.  Doing some hard talking with her we both discovered ADHD and the effect it had on our marriage.  It was such a relief and now we both are wanting us to be together again but have hit some road blocks, let me explain and hopefully someone has gone though this and can lend a hand. 

 

My husband and I have been together for 6 years.  We got married last June.  Hes 26 and I’m 25.  He was diagnosed with ADHD before we met.  He told me about it in the beginning but I never really thought anything of it.  I thought it was just that he couldn’t hold still and always had to have the t.v. on, etc.  I had no idea how much it impacted his life nor did I ever look into what it really was.  Last December he asked me for a divorce.  We had been fighting pretty heavily for the previous two months.

Judging by the posts about the non ADHD partners, it would seem that a relationship that consisted of 2 adults with ADHD would be a chaos ridden battleground, not to mention what happens when little ADHD people come along. My spouse and I have endured each others faults and foibles for over 20 years, 17 of which were undiagnosed. Maybe it is easier to forgive your partner when you recognize your own faults, especially when those faults are echoed in the other. We discovered that the diagnosis was key in improving our quality of life.

Hi everyone, i guess i get so frustrated by the description of the ADD person.  They are incapable of finishing anything, they are unreliable and they are a burden on the non ADD spouse. I have ADD and am classic about the highs of life thing. I am however, raising 3 girls, I started a Green Team in our town (including a website), I am on the Board of a local sports organization and have 2 other jobs that needed to be fixed. I am helping to improve some youth issues in towns. When people have issues, they come to me b/c they know I know how to fix it.

I have been reading her for quite some time now. My husband has ADD. He was diagnosed as a child. I didn't know this until after we were married. Looking back on our 10yr relationship, I now see all of the signs.

So, a few days ago, I had (what I think is) a great idea. My main way of coping with my husband and his ADHD is by ranting. Unfortunately, my friends and family, who don't really understand ADHD at -all-, tend to start disliking my husband because of the things I complain about. They think he's really inconsiderate and rude, etc. So instead of ranting to them, I started an online blog today so that I could share my husband's antics with other ADHD spouses and maybe get a little feedback and/or understanding without the condemnation to my husband.

M husband was diagnosed about a year ago and was prescribed Adderall for his ADHD.  It really did make a difference, but he has been struggling with the addictive nature of the medicine.  I've found out tonight he has been abusing it for the past months.  Feel like 4 steps forward, 20 backward.  Does anyone else know anything about this and what did you do?  I mean if its a syndrome and helps, is that just a side note that it's addictive?  Help!  I am shocked and really disappointed right now.  Thanks.
 

My ADHD husband has told me, "I keep things inside me, even though I'm really upset about something, but you have a harder time doing that". This doesn't make sense to me, because I believe that open communication is the key to a good relationship,  not "keeping it all inside". I don't nag or yell at him about things, I've  never been a nag, because I don't like that, but he REALLY has a hard time when I want to openly discuss something. He can talk for hours on lots of other things, but when it comes to US, he totally clams up. I don't understand.

How do you really know if your husband/wife is (or was) in love with you, when they act on impulse much of the time? This is very hard to understand because of the drastic change from dating to marriage, with almost a complete turnaround in actions. It IS hard to believe that they still love you when there is no more affection, and you end up living as roommates. I'd like to hear some view points from those who have ADHD, as well as others. THANKS

  
 

It has been a while since I posted. I've gotten so much help from this forum. I have been in counseling both with and without my non-add partner (DW) since January of this year. We had 3 sessions together and each one was bad for her, her words. She always came back to the massive hurt and stuff that years of my ADD behavior caused; I've always acknowledged this to her.