Recent forum posts (all topics)

My husband (who has a diagnosis of severe ADHD) had parents who were abusive/alcohilic/neglectful, but the one thing he valued was that they loved each other no matter what and stayed together till the end. So despite their dysfunctional, hurtful, abusive relations with each other, he believes love should be enough and no matter what happens you should stay with them until the end.

And after one month separated hes in the open relationship he asked for with someone else. We've been married for 14 years. Both of us had traumatic experiences in our early childhoods which were especially difficult due to family alcoholism. Being with him was like a breath of fresh air after home life. They say you should live independently before marrying and now I think they're right. 

All of this in the past week-none of these things are mind blowing, just holy wow--makes me wonder.  So earlier in the week we ordered out for Thai food from a place we order from all the time--I know what we all order and I have an account with Grub Hub-credit card saved, address info saved, everything.  DH did the ordering.  He could not figure out Grub Hub and when he finally did, two of the four orders were completely wrong, like he had to call and have the restaurant come back with the correct food.  What is so hard??

Dear young ones, I just heard a speaker say that the thing men find most attractive in a woman is that she keeps to her standards.  Here is a great lesson to all you younger wives.  I don't know it if goes both ways.  Standards was not one of the things on my list when I fell in love with my husband at a very young age.  I was naive.  I valued sense of humor, physique and words of affection.  Silly me. Standards!  I took so much for granted, like standards. I thought all people tried their hardest to make a marriage work and be a good spouse.

Hello All,

My face is still wet from the epic breakdown I just experienced. I was talking to my husband after dinner - telling him about my dad (in his 70s) and his many health problems, the most significant of which is undertreated depression. I typically hold things in and communicate very little that is important/meaningful with my husband because I know his limitations. My dad has gone through a lot over the past year my husband knows little about. However, I shared a few of his health struggles for the first time tonight along with my feelings of helplessness and sadness about it.

I am to the point of ultimatum with my DH. So so very exhausted. Failing to understand and probably failing to care anymore. I live with my a severe hearing loss and take full responsibility in managing it. I guess I look at ADD as a disability also. What would our married world look like if I refused to acknowledge my disability. If I refused to wear hearing aids. If I was in total denial and pretended there was nothing wrong with my hearing. Not sure what I am trying to say except I do not lie about my physical issues. Why should he!

I've been struggling in my marriage for years. It's been very confusing because none of the problems in our relationship were there before we got married, which wad immediately followed by my husband's big promotion. More than anything, I was struggling to understand why "stress" causes my husband to become so distant and distracted that he doesn't even notice me touching him: it's like being affectionate with a statue!!! I never get that way no matter how stressed I am!

Anyone else's ADHD person always seem to have some ailment?  My DH has had more illnesses and issues and surgeries than anyone else I know and just the daily complaints are just unreal.   Headaches almost daily.  His knees hurt.  His eyes bother him.  He has an ear ache-needs to get his ears cleaned out.  Last night it was a stomach ache that made him sleep on the couch (I do not see the connection there but whatever).  It really is almost comical: something is always wrong.  Couple that with the drama of daily life-wow.  Today was the company outing at Great America (Gurnee Illinois).

Hello everyone!  I recently started to research ADHD as my husband was diagnosed a couple of years ago and I feel that he is under treated.  Our eight year marriage had been on a steady decline and I realize we are both contributing to this, however, I had no idea the impact ADHD was having on us until doing tons of research recently.  I feel like I could have written, myself, so many books, & comments I've read from ADHD spouses.