Recent forum posts (all topics)

This is what I've learned.  I will start...by saying, I honestly don't hold onto anger or hold "grudges" very long.  That's because I've learned to process my anger and get rid of it pretty fast.  Processing is a coping mechanism.  Everyone gets angry....and anger is always legitimate to the person.  Having a "right" to be angry is based on you...the person angry and it's always in your "right" to be angry.  Expressing your anger verbally to another person is also in your "right" to do so...but your dancing a fine line and skating on thin ice...is you can't express your anger and tell the o

I am a computer technician with a company for 13 years (been with them for 15 years).  i am intellectual and logical.  I am politically correct when i know i need to be.  i also haven't gotten along with my wife for a very long time.  instead of her realizing the issue is her, she looks online to find out how it is my issue.

She says I am ADD/ADHD (because our oldest daughter has it and it is, of course, my fault)

She says I am OCD.

She says I have aspergers.

I have to let go.  My concept of work is so different than my wife's and we approach things so differently....I need to let go.

My idea of what is work...and what is not work?

If you don't break a sweat and need a shower at the end of the day...you're not working

If it doesn't hurt or you feel no pain.....you're not working

If you aren't sore and tired at the end of the day....you're not working

If your muscles don't ache and you don't feel the burn while you're working....you're not working

One of the hardest things we went through for both of us when my husband was first diagnosed in 2006  The psychiatrist he was seeing, gave him the book "Delivered from Distraction", and we also got the tapes.

Everyone lies.  I watched a program about lying and how people lie.  As it pointed out, lying is a human condition.  We all lie at different times for different reasons.

I got married about a year ago and was not prepared for the fact that my husband has pretty severe ADHD. I was the one who figured out there was something wrong that he needed to go see specialists. And my suspicion was correct - that he has Tourette's and ADHD. It's been a rollercoaster and a heartbreaking process dealing with it. Had to convince him to go to doctors and finally he was open to it. We got from a neuropsychologist who tested him, to a neurologist, to his primary care doc (who prescribed way too low for some reason) and finally to a psychiatrist.

Must be nice to be able to take 4-5 hours of "smoke breaks" in a day when the house is still a wreck, things are still unpacked, garbage bins are full, counters are filthy, backyard is messy and junky.... 

But you know - Facebook and Cigarettes.... thats whats important.  Really trying to hold in my temper as I take a few minutes away from trying to figure out something for work.  Must be nice to be able to have anything and everything you want, and not have to follow through with WHAT YOU AGREED UPON AS YOUR CONTRIBUTION to the home.... 

I used to have a beloved, big smooth collie.  He would tramp mud and shake himself and cause dirt and dishevelment.  He would NEED to run hard outside every day a couple times a day. He would chase animals, He ate a lot of food. I loved that dog.  We took good care of each other.

Now I have a chihuahua.  He is sweet and "holds it" when he has to "go out" until he sees that I am available to take him out. He is quiet, cuddly, never nips. When he runs inside the house it is like little powderpuff prances.  I love this dog. We take good care of each other.

Traveling with ADHD people who also have other mental health issues is just not worth it.

We've taken two short beach trips this month (3-4 days each), and while the actual hotel days themselves were ok, the before and after have been awful.

I've come to a realization that is plaguing me to the point of distraction. I have accepted it...but I have yet to move on from it that appears to be at the source of something I have yet to come to any understanding of. It really is about anger and denial and it is part of the inability on my wife's part to speak to me openly about this which is why I have come here and stayed here looking for something that will allow me to put this mystery to rest and just move on from it.