Recent forum posts (all topics)

NON ADHD spouse in Denial

My husband was recently diagnosed with ADHD, on the heels of having our 5 year old son diagnosed as well.  After some acceptance of his overall diagnosis and a lot of pushback on the treatment end, my husband is slowly coming around to recognizing he needs to work on things.  While he has done well career-wise, he's in denial that seeking treatment for his ADHD could drastically improve things at home.  We are participating in Melissa Orlov's ADHD in Marriage seminar via phone and he seems to be somewhat coming to terms with having to work on things.  I've already told my husband that this

Hi. 

I think this particular piece of advice from this forum could easily apply to all sectors of married life.  

"The goal is to be the best people we can be...and see if this keeps us married.  You don't want to remain married at all costs (that's the "old" way)"  ~Melissa Orlov~   

I choose to believe my ADHD spouse and I are both working on that.

Good morning. 

Where to begin? Ahh, perhaps the beginning:

I was diagnosed with ADD in my mid-20s when I only had two toddlers and was a navy wife stationed hundreds of miles from family, friends, and support. I was overwhelmed and not keeping up with domestic tasks. I was placed on Adderall with no therapies. It raised my BP so my PCM placed me on wellbuterin. That gave me migraines. After becoming frustrated with my PCM over constant ineffective med changes and all the side effects that came with them, I gave up and learned to cope on my own.

Husband's problems with ADHD nearly killed our cat and could have potentially hurt us and the pets in multiple situation

I'm not sure whether to cry with joy or sadness at finding this site--I'm so relieved to find others going through the same things, but then I'm sad for those of you going through the same things!  I've been overwhelmed lately, with the normal responsibilities that I have to take care of since P doesn't follow through with much, even when I ask for help.

How do you find a therapist who is experienced in ADHD couples? I secretively asked my husband's doctor for one for me to see to try to learn to cope with his ADHD and stay married. After waiitng months to get in her schedule, I' ve had several visits where I always leave feeling like I've wasted my time and money. Not one bit of advice on how to cope other than seeming to support divorcing him or "assertiveness training" for me which has thus far involved my writing down when I feel I wasn't assertive.

I need help on this rollercoaster.