Recent forum posts (all topics)

How Can You Work Something out with someone if you try but they avoid you?

I have recently been diagnosed with ADHD, but ever since I was little people have always suspected it. I was the kid that couldn't sit still always talking in class, would not try unless it was something extremely challenging(and did extremely well especially in math science and history), played sports and had a natural gift but never really fully applied myself because I was always frustrated with coaches making decisions I didn't agree with, officials for things I didn't agree with and myself because I know I was better than what I was doing.

Hello all.  I have lurked here for weeks reading the various posts and this will be the first post from me personally.  I would like to say that the many stories I have read here have done much to help me gain a modicum of perspective and sanity which has been sorely needed on my part as of late.  As much as I would like my first post here to be one of happiness and hope, I'm afraid that this forum will instead serve as the medium for a public announcement of a sudden, almost spontaneous realization on my part several weeks ago that - in regards to remaining with my ADHD spouse -  I am simp

Sometimes I feel like the anger and frustration of living with two ADD people (50 yr old husband/16 yr old son) is going to consume me.  As hard as I try to be understanding I am just so tired of doing 95% of the housework and having to ask repeatedly for the help that I do get.  I will say he helps with shuttling our kids around and will do things when I ask.  But rarely does he offer to do anything around the house or even seem to notice that there are things that need to get done!  I try not to nag but I get so angry when I ask nicely several times for specific tasks and usually they are

I will never leave my wife. I will never give up. That is just the way I am made. I sometimes wish I wasn't though. Life with an ADHD wife (for over 15 years) has been very difficult although I love her deeply. Emotional explosions over the smallest things, her hyper focusing on the things that are wrong and not the positives, and the verbal tongue lashings she dishes out push me to the edge on a regular basis. We had a great friendship and intimate life until we had children.

Hi everyone,

This is my first post though I have read through many of the posts in these forums. I had a huge post that just got eaten somehow, so this one will be much more brief...

"""because I love him I am going to try and work things out,because he is only good a few days in a month I would stay with him,because he takes me out I would stay with him,because he helps me financially twice a year,because because because."""

these were my excuses!! those were my words, to my Mother,friends and family.I read a lot of post here and one in particular says that "we are in control of our OWN HAPPINESS" that is sooo true! we are.

My whole life, I was working for LOVE and FAMILY.  I never thought I needed to work for respect, especially from people in my family who were SUPPOSED to love me and have my back.  I even had the idea that RESPECT was something tough and rough people demanded and that demanding respect was not being loving and partnering. That, in my case did not work.  There are lots of self-centered people out there who see a loving, giving person as a schmck and opportunity to play puppet-master with them.

I live in a state of perpetual anger, sadness, and loneliness and find this site frustrating. Why? Because the information though very good and right on the mark, however it is useless in this household. It doesn't seem to make a dent in my husbands behavior or attitude. There is a lot of lip service about "communicating better, paying attention to me, doing what he says..." but there is a consistent lack of action. How can any of this stuff work if the words only penetrate through the eyes and not into the brain or heart. I am ready to scream and wish I could run away.

I have tried and tried to be patient with my fiance who has ADD but I am tired. Tired of the disappearing acts, aka lack of communication (we currently do not live together), tired of the excuses, he is swamped with work to do (which is code for don't expect a peep out of him for who knows how long but he has plenty of time to be on Facebook all hours of the day and night posting useless things or responding to anyone and everyone that posts on there. I have been catching him in lies lately, ofcourse he denies everything and tells me I am over reacting.