Recent forum posts (all topics)

Medications for the Non-ADHD Spouse

Forum: 

Despite my dislike of using medications and financial problems and concerns about side effects, I've finally started to consider the possibility of asking my doctor about getting a prescription for an anti-anxiety medication.  My biggest fear is that the medication will work so well that I'll stop caring about my crappy marriage and will stop working to make myself and my life better.  What advice can non-ADHD spouses offer?  Thanks!

psychological problems the non-ADHD spouse experiences

Forum: 

I am hoping someone can provide a comprehensive resource, or list of comprehensive resources, that discusses the various psychological problems that a non-ADHD spouse experiences due to the effects of living in an untreated/undertreated ADHD home.  All my searches wind up leading me to articles that speak almost exclusively about the ADHD spouse.  I am not talking about the spouse having their own disorder or anything--merely the psychological effects that the ADHD itself can create in the non-ADHD spouse.

Marriage has a deadline

I am sad to say that I am approaching 50 and have spent most of my life with people who dissappointment me. My parents, my husband. I do not have that high of standards that they are impossible to meet but I seem to be a magnet for people with ADD, why is that I can't figure out. being the daughter of an ADD person you would have thought I would not have married a man with it also, Ahh but it was hidden so well...and oh the romance was intoxicating.

Want to leave my husband,but can't....any advice would be greatly appreciated...

I can't seem to leave him...I could give him breaks, and go about my days but, after a few days has gone, I would be right back with him...He is very disrespectful and unkind at times, and I don't think I want to spend the rest of my life with him...I want to move on and I can't,I don't have it in me to break it off ,and it has me very frustrated.I don't know if I should start therapy b/c of this and try to come up with some decision soon.I would try to ignore him and go about my days but then he would do something really mean that would make me resent him really bad...like he continues to

Husband with ADHD seems like he has to be right all the time

I'm new to this forum and my husband has been diagnosed with ADHD for about 5 years now.  He also suffers from anxiety, depression, and PTSD.  I didn't notice his need to be right all the time at the beginning of our relationship.  I'm not sure if I was just high on emotion and blind with love and infatuation or if he didn't exhibit this behavior as much then.  I use to be able to talk to him when he was depressed and make him feel better.  Now it seems like when he's depressed I can't say anything that makes him feel better.  I try to tell him good things about himself, but he just denies

Input from non-ADHD wives, please: doubting wanting to ever be married

Well, about 2 months ago my wife of 2 years left the house; we married when she was 34 and this is my 2nd marriage, her first.  She immediately began therapy to find out why she was so depressed and unhappy and neither of us could understand what was happening in our marriage.  After the first month she was gone, I was diagnosed with ADHD and after reading about it, everything began to make sense to me; I’m now being treated.  As things between us detiorated while she was gone, like the typical ADHD hateful verbal lashings when something caused hurt or anxiety, she became convinced and told

I feel almost nothing....

I have been married for 13 years.  Frustration has always been a part of the marriage but I could deal with it.  The last 2 years though, I have finally reached my limit.  After a very up and down year my husband finally agreed to marriage counseling.  He has admitted that he is depressed and acknowledges that he shows all signs of being severely ADHD.  We have been to two sessions with a counselor that specializes in couples therapy as well as adult ADHD/ADD.  Hubby did complete the written evaluation the therapist asked him to do (after 7 days of me nagging him to do it) but has yet to ag

Broken promises

I am new to this website as my husband and I are just now becoming aware of his ADHD and its impact on our marriage.  We have been married for 20 years and have had our share of problems, leading us to marriage counseling at least 4 times with inconsistent results.  We now understand why.  Our son has been diagnosed with ADHD and as we are learning more about him we are making connections as to why we have many of the problems we have struggled with.  Among many of my issues is what I always called broken promises or him not being a man of his word.  I feel guilty about this now that I real

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