Recent forum posts (all topics)

My husband called at 5 pm yesterday that he was just leaving the office. With the highway traffic, I figured he should be home by 7 pm. He did not return my calls or texting ever since and it is already noon next day. I have no clue what he is doing. Last week, he did not come home till 3 am. He said he had a tough day at work, and got so overwhelmed when he called home and listened to my frustrated voice about his late return while the youngest son screaming near the phone. (We have 3 sons. Age 8, 6, 2). 

I just saw the show.  What I liked about it:

(1) Really informative regarding how its diagnosed, treatments, ramifications, gave hope.   (2) Funny.   (3) Relaxed and clear presentation of information.

What I did not like:

(1) The part where they said "Have the right partner".

OK. The past couple of weeks I have read, and chatted and ranted and supported and identified and related and bashed (and laughed) on this site.  I am ready now to ask my big question:

Is there anyone here- anyone at all (besides Melissa Orlov and Sherri), married to someone with ADD/ADHD who managed to bring their marriage back from the dead?  I don't mean "We weren't getting along" or "We argued all the time but still really loved each other."  I mean a true resurrection.

When I first suggested to DH that he might have ADHD, he was very very upset.  He tried to deny it.  I sent him some things to read from here and I think he's coming around.  He has an appointment with his therapist tonight and he told me that he is going to bring it up with him.

*fingers crossed* we'll see some progress!

So... I haven't been to this site in a few days with any regularity.  In my absence... it seems that a few of my compatriots have nearly brought old fashioned lynching justice to their spouses.  I on the other hand, curled in a ball and wanted to die.  But... as luck would have it... I got a chance to play the revenge card instead.  It cost me a ten minute sexcapade with my frigid wife... (big frickin whoop) but it was soooooooo worth it... Okay... let me paint the picture and tell you where it all began...

Okay this whole hyperfocus thing confuses me. Mine has been in hyperfocus for several days. Can an ADHDer really switch it off and on? If so how long can they sustain it and if they can, why don't they? Am I making any sense?

Well my original post said I was trying. Since I'm not. I thought I'd move over here since I'm birthing a new me. I need to talk to him, I'll need help. He is going over the top. This a.m. He pointed out that he's rock and rolling, chores done etc. He even IRONED my son's band pant's..he was afraid to do the jacket so he left a note by the coffee pot to ask me to finish that. A NOTE !! He kept asking me what was wrong, why I was so peevish.

So many have written here wondering if their husband/wife with ADD will ever "get it".  For those of you who have ADD and do understand the consequences of past actions, how your ADD impacted your relationships, how your spouse reacted to you, etc....WHAT made you "get it"?  Was it medication?  Was it counseling?  Both?  Or a drastic step on the part of your partner?

At what point, did your realization come alive?

Thanks for your thoughts.

/

I'm pretty stumped for ideas on what to get him for Christmas.  I've been sort of obsessing over getting him a smartphone (like iphone, but cheaper) but I wonder if it's just what I want for him, not what he wants. (also, it's really expensive)  If I ask him what he wants, he says he needs a winter cap or mittens (which he will lose in a few weeks anyway).

So, I've noticed some common threads in interests of the ADD dudes (say: computers) so I'm wondering what y'all are getting your ADD guy. Or what the ADD guys on here would like.