Recent forum posts (all topics)

My wife has two sisters, both younger.   The youngest has given up having any sort of relationship with my wife due to extremely poor behavior towards her child.   The other sister is an enabler and my wife knows she can have power over her by yelling really loud for a long time.   It's a power tactic and her sister caves in and agrees with my wife in order to maintain a sort of peace between them.   This enabling has caused problems because they twist information between the two of them continually.   I've tested this by responding to this sister's interest in helping us work out our dif

My DH lost is dad last October and has realized that his dad was his enabler his whole life.  My DH is now lost and knows that he needs to learn how to handle his life by himself.  We have been married 8 years and are in our early 50's so no youngsters here.  I find myself very frustrated that he can't seem to get a handle on his life.  He is seeming a counselor and does well with the sessions, but not at home.  We were supposed to write down 5 things that we would like our spouse to work on.  That was 3 weeks ago...I have done mine....but he hasn't done his. 

 I've been mildly struggling with ADHD probably since childhood but of course, I just thought I was stupid. Into adulthood, I began to joke about it around people, saying I should have been born a blonde.

I decided to make this its own topic since I found a response by Aspen in a response to a post by Hoping4More about the unacceptability of eye rolling, sighing, huffing, and storming as a response to a disagreement.

We've come a long way in the last two years. He's getting treatment now and I've overcome a lot of anger and frustration by realizing he didn't mean to do any of the things he did but I thought I'd share this one experience because maybe it will help somebody.

I've been trying to reading books and read the forum and I'm trying follow some of the advice given.  One of the main ones that keeps coming up is "make a list".  Earlier this week I had some me time (per our counselor) so I sat down with my DH before I left and we agreed on what he would do that night while I was gone.  When I got home - none of the 4 items had been done.  I asked him if there was anything I could do to help him remember.  He replied "a list would be great". 

**banging my head against the wall**

My wife and I had a short argument this morning about my "need" to have things in a certain place.  And as I was trying to explain to her why it matters to me that things are in a certain place, I had an "a-ha" moment.  And that is this:

After all the emotional stuff on here this morning, I'm almost ashamed to post this...

Hi Folks, Hoping you all can help. I've been together with my girlfriend for 6 years and it has been very rocky. I suspect she has ADHD and exhibits conflict seeking behavior and is never on time for anything. I have asked her to come to counseling with me, but when I tried to set it up, it didn't fit with her schedule. I gave her the counselors contact info and tried to get her to set it up 3 times and that was 5 months ago and still no progress. She refuses to even discuss the possibility that she has ADHD and gets angry when I bring up the topic.

So the other night at about 3am, I'm feeding our 5 week old baby in our bedroom.  My ADD husband finally comes upstairs to go to bed.  He comes in and has this "look" on his face...a look he gets when he's really guilty about something.  He admits to me that when he took our baby to the store to buy some ice cream that evening, he forgot/left her in the car.  He didn't tell me all evening.  When he told me, I was half asleep so at first it was hard to comprehend and I know I didn't react as strongly than I would have fully awake (maybe he knew that??).  It was, thank GOODNESS, a very shor