Recent forum posts (all topics)

I am having a hard time lately. I am staying in my marriage for now to avoid sharing custody with my adhd spouse because of how detrimental/dangerous that would be for our daughter. But I have a long road ahead if I stay until she is 18 (she's almost 11 now) and it is wearing on me.

I don't want couples therapy (well, I did in the past, but my husband repeatedly refused). Rather I am wondering if anyone could pipe in on their experiences with individual therapy.

I was diagnosed with ADHD in my late 30’s, I’m now 44. My wife does not have ADHD and tells me I’m not treating my symptoms and until I do, she’s not willing to begin counseling with me. 

I take my Adderall everyday and try to take it late enough in the day to last into the evening but not interfere with sleep. Sleep has always been an issue regardless and that’s a separate issue. 

I think it's important to keep in mind that most "needs" are actually desires; and most things that we say we or our partners "can't" do are actually things that we or our partners won't do.  Despite biology, including the wiring of brains of people with ADHD and the brains of people without ADHD, nearly everything is a choice, not an immutable process.  So, if you're married and you don't like what your partner does or doesn't do, accept that it's your choice to stay married or to split. Whichever you do, own the decision.

The thread on demanding sex got me thinking. My DH is very demanding with sex but he is also very focused on his other physical needs(wants). He has a huge appetite can eat anytime anywhere. Literally eats us out of house and home. Also demanding and thoughtless about what he wants in that area. 

He seems to require little sleep at night but can fall asleep anytime anywhere. 

Too much info but he is obsessed with his bowel movements. Has a total freak out if he is constipated. Blames me for it if you can believe it. What is with this?!?

Not sure what to title this. Maybe I am nitpicking but my 57 year old DH dots the i in his name with a happy face. I do not say anything to him about it but find it weird and childish. It is even more disturbing when it is on our business forms and papers such as contracts. Is this an ADD trait?

I've read numerous old post this morning, while having my coffee....(It's something that is good for me, it helps me stay centered and living in a mind of acceptance, by reaffirming the reality of living with a partner who is incapable of seeing themselves)...When you go back and read these posts, there is one very common theme....We don't understand their thinking (or lack of it)...And no matter what problem's we are enduring (no help in the house, financial, withholding their bodies, angry outburst, sexual immorality, can't hold a job, or want work) the outcome of trying to get them to di

Okay, I may come across as the most petty person on the planet and if so, feel free to call me out on this but it has bothered me for a long long time.  If you have read any of my posts here you know I have been married for 23 years to an unmedicated ADHD man and we have a 19 year old son and a 17 year old son.  DH has been unemployed many times, in fact his last three jobs only lasted three years each.  He has a high school diploma only and went into the Air Force where he only made it to Staff Sergeant.

So this just happened first thing in the morning.  I am 2 rooms away and I hear H say angrily, disgustedly, "My God."  I walked in the kitchen and asked what was the "My God" about?  He said, disgustedly, "WE HAVE 2 BREADS."  I had bought a loaf of bread and he had bought a loaf of bread.  Then he took the empty egg carton he had in his hand and threw it on the floor and angrily stomped on it to flatten it loudly and pointedly.

My husband was recently diagnosed with ADHD a few months ago. We have been married for 21 years and have a 17 yr old and a 5 yr old.  We have been in couples therapy for 3 years going in circles until finally figuring out he has ADHD. I think my therapist new all along but knew that if my husband didn’t come up with it on his own he would never have believed her and wud have ended our couples therapy immediately.  Only because all these years of struggle have been due to the fact that I am crazy, emotional, depressed, and unable to handle life.