Recent forum posts (all topics)

The past two nights had little sleep. Work the past two days has been difficult as weather has complicated our operations, compiled with people returning to work after a holiday. 

 

I really, really want to shout at the frustration. 

 

I know I am liable for my outbursts. I will do my best to not take my frustrations out on my coworkers or loved ones. 

Just needed to vent and breathe. 

I try to communicate properly but the lack of forethought in my words, or the manner in which I inflect them, usually falls flat and leaves me with a my foot in my mouth, and we have a fit. I am angry how I expressed myself, my wife - the non-ADHD person, is sensitive because she is hurt and feels like she did something WRONG, and this instance ruins our entire day. 

 

If we could go on the a game show, teh way we communicate, would fail in 20 seconds. 

My wife and I have different energy levels. This is established. When I clean, its not perfect but I work till I drop. When my wife cleans - she cleans like you're getting your teeth cleaned - thorough. but she doesn't clean often. I pick up for us, pick up some of her stuff, and I have to remember she does the appointment making, bookkeeping, child disciplining, etc. 

 

The fact she doesn't put her dishes in the dishwasher, SHOULDN'T drive me crazy but does. I keep on his NEGATIVE kick and forget how loving my wife is. 

My wife is looking to get divorced after five years of marriage. She says I get focused on a task or a slight, become frustrated - voice a passive aggressive statement or a mean comment, then once that is spouted - I'm fine. But I leave her hurting in the meantime. 

The stimulus creating the frustration is unimportant - the fact that I take out my anger on my wife, is horrid. 

 

I want to be clear - I do not physically harm anyone, only with my mouth. 

 

I need to control it better. 

 

I'm spending the holidays with my ADHD BiPolar II diagnosed, and medically treated boyfriend.  We've been together for 2 years.  I think he's a confused genius and he's hilarious and lovely to be around.  When he's engaged and all there.  As i've learned from reading around, the hyper-focus ends, and i actually found that to be somewhat of a relief, but we've moved in together as of a couple months ago, and I have to say, it's been one of the hardest things i've ever done.  I've been in other long term relationships, and i've *never* had the difficulties i am having in this one.

In the need for humor?  One my favorite comedy sketches....on the topic of arguing.  Enjoy.

https://youtu.be/kQFKtI6gn9Y

 

J

My husband has been severely depressed for the last two years.  He's been taking citalopram for about a year now.  During this year, I have suggested to him numerous times, to find another med.  He is still depressed, can't sleep because the med makes him feel awake, and is down right mean sometimes.  After realizing the citalopram might be making him less empathetic towards people and situations, I talked to him about it and backed up the information with research.  I also told him that I went off citalopram in the past for the same reason- I became a jerk, I didn't care about anyone or an

I think the hardest thing for me at the moment is dealing with H not being present. We did Melissa's couples course last year and things were going great. H was having regular appointments and he was really really making an effort to create an intentional relationship. fast forward a year and yet again the downward spiral has started. It started going downhill when we went and stayed with a friend of mine for the weekend a few months ago. He forgot to take his meds and spent most of the weekend on his phone not really speaking to anyone.

My husband is having difficulty really believing ADHD is part of him. His explosive anger tempers are drainign for me and my children. My son talks to me how sad he is but clams up and is unable to approach his father. The baby stats screaming or hiding when he is angry. 

We have frustrating interactions where my husband thinks he's caught me saying something inaccurate and corrects me.  After he tells me I'm wrong, and bat whatever it is around, often he reverses himself and then tries to claim he never made the original statement. I don't think he means to hurt my feelings, he is just backtracking from his impulsive first statement, but the cover-up and rationalizations are fierce. This drives me around the bend.