Recent forum posts (all topics)

Does anyone else feel like their ADHD partner really just doesn't fundamentally understand the emotional impact of their actions and behaviors on others? Like there's almost some kind of real, mental barrier that actually prevents the connections from being made?

Hello everybody,

I admit that I've been reading these forums for months now but only recently felt empowered (or possibly desperate) enough to sign up and voice my thoughts and feelings. I have been diagnosed with PTSD, ADD and Fibro.  My husband has been diagnosed with ADHD.  This is a bit of a long story and I apologize in advanced if it seems a little disorganized. I feel a bit overwhelmed and that tends to affect my thought process. I can't really decide what is relevant info so I just shared all of it. 

Before we met:

I haven't posted in some time.  For a short review, my (now ex) DH is ADHD.  We were married for 29 years.  He left 5 months after the sudden death of my mother.  I tried to get him to work on our marriage, he just didn't want to.  He filed for divorce last October. It became final today. Our 16 year old son is living with me in our home, which I get to keep.  I have mixed emotions. I'm sad about the marriage ending because at some point he was my best friend and the husband I loved.  I'm also relieved and a bit excited about what my future will be.

My partner was diagnosed with ADHD before we met 14 years ago.  He takes Adderall 90 mg/day.  He is abusing the Adderall -- taking more than the prescribed dosage.  Two months ago, he admitted to running out 4 days before he could get his prescription filled.  He only admitted this after I asked him if he'd run out (it was apparent to me that something was wrong).  After that, we agreed that I would dole out the meds to him daily.  This worked for the first month.  A few days ago, I discovered that he got into the meds where I had hid them and is now going to be three days short this month.

So, I am in a relationship with ADHD partner. We tread a fine line between Enabling and Understanding our ADHD partners. On one end of the scale we have the school of thought to just accept them for who they are and pick up all the slack because they cannot help it and on the other end of the scale are those who seem to comment that if they are not pulling their weight then end it. We spouses constantly swing in between both and quite frankly it does my head in to the point where my own mental health is becoming an issue.

Hi

I have four kids, five if you include the ADHD husband, am pregnant, and desperately need help because I have the worst cold-flu of my life. My husband refuses to work, does absolute minimal childcare during the day (everyone is adequately cared,for, but I have to,prep meals to warm up, set out clothes, etc) and no housework at all ever. His response to me being sick is to say I'm faking, even though I'm not breathing well. I probably should have gone to the ER yesterday as my lips turned blur nut he would not allow it. Does anyone have any effective strategies for asking family for help?

Most of the dysfunction in my life and in the world as I see it stems from this one quest, "The desire to be loved"....The desire for interaction, the desire for community. We are created to be relational beings.