Recent forum posts (all topics)

This is my first post (although I did write a reply earlier). I am an undiagnosed adhd male in my second relationship. My wife, a good person by all accounts, has become the same angry, hurtful and physically aggressive person that many of the wives and girlfriends on this forum have become. I, in turn, clearly am the idiot with the same mental illness that the husbands they refer to are. Shockingly, I read through a dozen posts and their comments only to realize how much of an evil bastard I have inadvertently been all this time.

So living with my ADHD husband there are so many phrases that I hear that make me want to run screaming into the street.  Some of the phrases I could live without ever hearing again include:  I just didn't think about it.  I didn't do it on purpose.  I've got it covered (when the opposite is true).  No, did you ask me to?  No, did you tell me to?  I can't remember saying/doing that.  I can't remember you saying/doing that.  I didn't finish...whatever.  I'll do it tomorrow/later (when we know it's NEVER).  And my most favorite: I forgot.  Man am I tired of hearing all of those phrases.

2014 was the year of his secret bank account (since closed when discovered). The year he asked me to get a form notarized so he could take some $ out of his work IRA to pay kid's tuition--and seemed astounded when I found and read the missing  pages of the document and realized I'd be signing off all rights to my share of his pension (and I didn't sign that paper).

funny!!   here i sit in crystal.  sitting with the remaining bigger items for the Uhaul move tomorrow.  crystal to slp.  pefectionistic and wants to control all aspect and in order to maintian that illusion she( you know..me) must be on her A Game.  I do that....go in and out of 

11AM pick up Uhaul​

at Uhaul..crystal 

starting *1015AM Kim will meet in crystal.  1030*back to house with truck and one car.  11*am Tyler (kim)arrives tab:  tyler J and Ryan?? still dont know...phone crap.  1130* go to slp and so on and so on.  you get it right?

My boyfriend and I have been together for a little over a year now. He has inattentive ADHD and has a history of verbally abusive relationships. I myself have OCD and have a history of physically abusive relationships. This makes things very difficult since I am not currently on any form of anxiolytics and he is on Ritalin which also, as you all may know, has a side-effect of anxiety. Go figure. This makes communication very hard because when he gets confused or flustered or is trying to refocus himself, he becomes angry.

Anyone have any insight on this?  Has anyone done this and how did it pan out?

Note to self:  make the 'to do list' the night BEFORE the day comes.

I say this as a start to a routine sched.  I'm finding it exremeley hard to know what and where I should 'start' my very busy (or at least it should be) day.  I just keep looking around and coming back to the screen.  

Focus and Breathe. ... Calm and Steady.  Relax and Go.

I am at my wits end.  My ADHD husband spends so much  time on youth hockey for our kids that is has impacted the ability for our family to function in a productive manner.   This has been going on for  almost 25 years.  First, we cannot afford it as he has been in and out if work since we married 20 yeArs ago.   Second, he refuses to pull our kids out of hockey even though it has push us deeper into debt.

Still trying to understand my now ex's  'ways' so I hope you don't mind another question.

It always seemed to me that my ex never had an original thought of his own, he always seemed to be heavily influenced by others, or whatever bandwagon was passing at the time he could jump aboard onto.

Everything from small trivial everyday stuff right up to big stuff like wanting to emigrate because a work mate moved.