I am sitting at my desk looking out the back sliding doors. The birds are all over the feeders, directly off the west end of the deck. The awning is swaying gently. There to the right - is the barn. And buckets of stuff. And a wheelbarrow. And totes. And metal. And rolls of plastic pipe. And an old cart for stackable chairs. And some plastic milk cartons full of miscellaneous things.
I have tried.
I've been pleasant, kind, gracious, communicative, appreciative, and loving.
We have been together all day long at work for a year and a half, so my firm resolve to pursue a sense of normalcy for MYSELF, regardless of his antics, has been quite noticeable.
I do not discuss money with him anymore. I keep the books and review the balance sheets with his business manager. The business manager tells him, "Do not spend any money." Last night, I got shouted at because of that.
Hello all first post I have battled dysthymia and depression for most my life. I'm 40. Almost 4 years ago the wife and went to marriage counciling. We were 6 years into it. We havery two great kids. But I hated work and symptoms of ADHD were becoming apparent. Forgetfulness not following though etc.
We agreed to see a marriage councilor. It was helpful but I was the one with the problems. Ultimately I had a full psych eval done. Depression anxiety and ADHD. Plus I am smart. ( always a silver lining)
Hi All,
I'm new to this site but I realized after registering that I had already been to this site years ago but never engaged. Oh how sorry I am for that decision. I just came across Melissa's new book published in April 2014 on Amazon.com last night and I downloaded it. This past week, I was ready to leave my husband or have him move out. My situation became critical after I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis in March of this year. For three years, I had MS symptoms but didn't know quite what it was.
Hi all, I'm new here. My husband is in the process of getting diagnosed with ADHD. A little background: we've been married 6 years, just had our 2nd child 3 weeks ago. He moved out when I was 3 months pregnant and just moved back in about a month ago (yes, our relationship has gotten that bad) - this was the third time while pregnant that he said that's it, he was leaving. I said fine, leave - my prioirity needs to be safety and stability for me and the kids. I am exhausted from overfunctioning to compensate for his ADHD symptoms. I am emotionally done. Burnt out.
I don't understand him. A month ago he was all excited and told me that he only needed to complete 2 classes (one online and one reading a book and then taking a test in front of someone) and he would qualify for a QA position which he would get immediately because there are a bunch available and he wouldn't have to submit a resume or anything because he'd be green lit for it. He told me this on July 30, which was 5 days after the fallout with his daughter which he claims to be all torn up about now, but apparently wasn't then? He was super excited about the whole thing back then.
H has always been horrible with money. He has no savings and lives check to check (when he goes to work). Two years ago he had no credit cards. Last year he got one for "emergencies". It had a $700 limit. Then on Amazon he got one because you get $50 off your purchase. He had about $300 on that and said he was going to pay that off immediately and get rid of it. Well I just checked his credit history on a website and his $700 card has now been bumped up to a $1750 limit and his other one he was going to pay off is a $2000 limit.
My husband was diagnosed with ADD 3 years ago. He has gone his whole childhood and on his 3 marriage and just found out he has it. It wasn't until 2 months ago that I realized we needed to get really real with this condition. Our marriage has been a nightmare for 11 years. It is amazing what we are learning about the condition and how everything that has happened has been all because of his ADD. It is all making so much sense now. He is still taking it all in and everyday gets better with him accepting he has it. We are now working on putting together a treatment plan for him so thi
One of my biggest problems with my husband, who I suspect has ADHD, is that when I express annoyance for something he's done that I think I have good reason to be annoyed by, he just gets angry at me for it rather than apologizing and owning up to it. I guess it's the defensiveness/denial at play, but it makes me question myself so much and I can't decide if I'm being too hard on him or if he's being manipulative.
I'm hoping that you can give me some ideas on how you might best respond to this little chronic issue I am having.
My husband sets the alarm clock to go off early, same time each day. We don't need to get up at that time, but one out of 10 or 12 times, he does, to go in to work early.
The other 9-11 times, he shuts it off and returns to sleep.
Returning to sleep is not an option for me. It takes him so long to turn it off that I am Up by then.
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The ADHD Effect on Marriage was listed in Huff Post as a top book that therapists suggest all couples should read.
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