Recent forum posts (all topics)

This topic came up in the Slug Box and I decided to create a new topic.  As in many relationships (both ADHD-affected and not), money and finances have caused stress in my relationship.  Here are some things I've done to protect myself and my children from what I would call my spouse's financial irresponsibility (checkered employment, doesn't deposit income regularly, pays bills late, is afraid to talk about money)  Please feel free to share your techniques and comments.

Hello,

I really hate when we have unstructured weekends. You would think this would be a good way to get things done. However, it seems to be a good way for my DH to start yet another project and leave in undone. I am really, really, frustrated today and need a little "misery loves company" to help me feel like I am not alone. (Because, as I look through my neighborhood, I feel truly alone. I see well-kept yards, no piles of various crap laying in yards, not random holes dug, garages that are neat and organized ...with cars parked IN them!!!

I googled, "loving too much" and found this: 

Loving someone means you respect him enough to set boundaries, expect that he treat you with respect and gives to you in as many meaningful ways as you give to him. A woman may have to fight her own tendencies to submit and sacrifice in the name of love. If it's love that she is after, then she will have to love herself enough to ask for what she needs and stop giving endlessly thinking it wins her a place in his heart.

For those who haven't seen my story in the ADHD parter forum:  I am a deployed military member and spouse of an ADHD wife who also suffers from low self esteem.  I have been gone for about seven months and will be home in close to a month.  For the first four months while I was gone, everything seemed to be going as well as could be expected.  We messaged one another over social media when we were waking up and going to bed, used video chat almost daily, and exchanged "I love you" frequently.  My wife suddenly and unexpectedly became emotionally distant.  She left our family home to stay wi

I'm new to this site and this is my first post. I could put together a decent list of ADHD issues that impact (or could seriously impact, if we lived in the same house and/or were legally married) our relationship, but I wanted to ask first about the ADHD partner misunderstanding communication. This one is going to tear us apart and be our downfall in the end (which may be here soon....).  My partner of 8 years (on and off) will misinterpret something I've said---usually something lighthearted---and become impatient with me, even to the point of getting angry.

Just curious. Spouses, what was/is your relationship with your father?  I ask because it occurs to me that if I could have talked to my Dad about these things and been assured that I would get support and that he would believe me, I could have made the necessary changes I needed to from the beginning and laying out the groundwork to be respected....or maybe I would never have had the over-tolerance to dh's actions and inaction and irresponsibilities.

Here's another question for you guys. Have some of you "non's" lost friends because of the challenges of living with an ADHD'er? (mainly the undertreated and undiagnosed, like our situation) I have lost many friends along the way, mainly due to the craziness in our house. My husband has hyperactive AND inattentive ADHD, and when he enters a room, it's like a tornado just touched down. He talks LOUD, and RUNS through the house, (not walking) and takes over every conversation.