Recent forum posts (all topics)

Panning for Gold

My paradigm of the Chain of Events:

1.  My spouse is in the dining room, backing-up (walking).  I don't remember why he was walking backward.

2.  My son is walking forward, carrying a bowl of 'right-off-the-stove' Ramen Noodle Soup.

3.  I am standing near the stove.

4.  A collision of the 2 men happens.  

5.  I cry out my spouse's name.

6.  Both men are splashed with boiling hot soup.

the final straw

My final straw came this week.  I don't talk to my husband much about our problems and he is happy for me not to do so.  But for me, although talking about things is hard, it seems just as bad to not talk about them.  So, I brought up how frustrated I am.  My husband almost immediately redirected the conversation to explaining how my bad reactions cause him to respond the way he does.  Once again, he took off the table the thing that I see as the major problems:  that he won't look for a better job and that he is contributing only minimally to the family, financially and in other ways.

No hope left

 Hi, This is the first time I have ever posted anything in my life. I am typically an insanely private person, but I’m at such a low point in my life I can’t help but reach out. I’ve been on an off of this website for a few years now and have gained some great insight, but haven’t activity participated in any of the discussions. I have certainly related with so many of the postings.

Shut Down

First, let me say, I am committed to my marriage and do not want to break up my family.  But ADD is making my life hell.  I have almost completely shut down towards my husband and just can't seem to help it.  He is trying and honestly has no idea how negatively his ADD affects me.  Or maybe he has head knowledge but it doesn't register enough for him to make any changes.  I know that my reactions to his ADD are just as bad as his inability to pay attention to me.  I am just at my wits end and so tired of being unhappy.  I have talked, cried, explained till I have nothing left.  He hears me

I am struggling in my marriage

Hi, I am wrecked, exhausted, overworked and beyond coping with organising my husband's life, picking up the unfinished pieces and dealing with debts, bills, children's needs and running my own business and the house. I think my husband may be ADHD.. just from reading about the symptoms and the effect on our marriage and my own life. I am a fixer, a strong and very capable organiser,.. so I've managed well to deal with 14 years with his maverick ways, multiple projects, debts, denials of consequences of actions, lack of coherent plans, unfinished business, disorganised paperwork/files etc.

Rules

I recognize that I am now full-on using this site as a therapeutic tool. Apologies to George for using these boards as a personal journal. As I've said elsewhere something about a journal is just incredibly annoying to me. The concept of writing things down for no audience but myself just seems ridiculous. Perhaps I love the tenor of my own prose, but only if it is available for public viewing. Vanity.

Swung 180 Degrees and now the rules are different?!?!?!?!

Here is my frustration for today:

I struggled with anorexia and bulimia from age 19 to about 30.  15 years of struggle.  "No quick fix."  was what I heard from psychiatrists/counselors.   My spouse used to come with me to some of my counseling.  The focus was me:  my issues; how I coped with emotional pain through the eating disorder behavior; how difficult it was for  my spouse to be hopeless in 'making' me eat differently. 

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