Rough times, but a ray of light....
Things have been rough here recently, but I'm seeing a small ray of light.
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Things have been rough here recently, but I'm seeing a small ray of light.
So this is my first post . Wrote on my phone sorry for the punctuation !
I have had adhd my entire life and am on medication.
I never thought that my adhd effected my life on a large level besides at work but in the last 6 months my marriage has been torn and we are trying to repair it .
I feel I am at a turning point. We have been married 12 years and have two children. DH started on adderall last year. I don't know if it is helping or not. It is hard to tell when he as taken it and I hate being a nag and asking about it. Anyway, at Christmas he left my families' celebration right before Santa was coming for the kids in a big huff over something ridiculous. He now is telling me how staying at my parents' house (3 hours away) is miserable and that they are welcome here (ha! I'm sure they feel that way now), and I can go up with the kids, but he won't be going anymore.
This is my first post after reading a bunch of stuff on this site. I'm using my real name as my forum handle because to me it's a small part of taking ownership of my own actions, problems, issues, etc. I'm the ADHD husband of our marriage.
Where do I begin? My husband of almost 2 years has a terrible temper, takes a simple conversation we are having and turns it around that he thinks I am attacking him and trying to start an argument when I wasn't at all. He then gives me the silent treatment and runs off to go to his dad's house in the valley and proceeds to talk to his ex girlfriend the whole way over to his dads house and I found out this morning he has talked to her all the way back too. I have texted him several times saying "I love you and did you have fun'? and he has not replied to me at all.
Yes, I am a newbie...and for spending just 15 minutes on the site, I suddenly felt heard and comforted. I am 31 years old, female and newly engaged to a wonderful artist 29 yr old, diagnosed with ADD since childhood.
I have been with my partner for 3 years. We met when we were 16 and were completely in love, very romantic, had his undivided attention etc. Then we decided to go to the same University, which was a very stressful time for me but he didn't seem stressed at all, despite the amount of work involved - he was just certain that it would work out, and that if it didn't, he'd follow me anywhere.
my husband reluctantly went to be diagnosed last year, he has been put on meds to control it but the dosage is not right yet, i don't know how much more i can put up with, i have had an early menopause due to cancer and he wants sex 24-7 it hurts me so much to have sex but that doesn't bother him as long as he is happy, i also don't want to have sex with him as it feels like having sex with my child as i spend all day being his mum.
I have been wondering why I have lost my ability to know what I want or to be happy. I am learning a little about "healing the inner wounded child" for reasons about why I find myself with dh and why I am the "helper" rather than the "helpee" in my attitude in relationships and why I am so unhappy. I did not expect people to treat me with respect and love me or to give to me or nurture me, so in my mind, I think I must "work" to be appreciated and loved by anyone.