Recent forum posts (all topics)

Hi…non- ADHD spouse here. I’ve posted a few times on this site and have all I can do to not sign in and read her for hours on end. My husband and I have a very pivitol appointment coming up with our ADHD coach. I say “our” because we use her as a marriage counselor. This meeting is sort of a come to Jesus meeting. I need to communicate some boundries, and other areas of opportunity that need to be dealt with. One of the big things that I’m struggling with his the outside of our home and yard.

Good morning all,

I am new to this site.  I would like a bit of advice.

I have been with my boyfriend for 3 years and we live together.  He is a contractor and has not been working outside of a few odd jobs here and there.  He has contributed very little to nothing to the household bills.  I pay the mortgage, food, utilities and even pay for vacations etc.  I even had to buy his brother's birthday present yesterday.

I'm not very good at it.  I can set boundaries for myself but he always manages to talk me out of them with his anger.  He gets angry with me when I say No.  He feels like I'm controlling him when all I'm doing is protecting myself.  He makes me feel incredibly guilty.

Hi, I'll start with some background history: I've been married for 5 years now and when my husband and I first met he told me that he was diagnosed with ADD when he was a child but his mom who is diseased now said that he didn't have to take the medication prescribed. In telling me this he also said that nobody in his family knew being his father and his older sister.  I figured he told me because I am his wife, he really didnt get into detail as to why he told me. But reading some of the personal experiences on this website, it seems as though he may have ADHD too or instead.

Before I came here I would go on other marriage websites and no one understood.  I would post my problems and I got standard answers that my husband just needed to "grow up and be responsible."  I knew there was more to it than that, but I couldn't explain to them how.  All I ever heard was how I needed to divorce my irresponsible husband and move on. 

I need some advice.  I cheated on my ADHD boyfriend as a result we are no longer together.  I am still living with him but in a different bedroom.  I know he doesn't want to give up on us and neither do I.  Everything became to much for me to deal with and instead of continuing to try and talk to him I made the mistake of kissing his best friend.  ( I am now in therapy to work out my own issues) I feel like now we are stuck between loving each other and not wanting to go back to the way things were.  We fought all the time about stupid things. To be honest he was very mean to me and I in tu

OK Been a long time stalker of this life saving forum. Such wonderful advice and support is shared. Reading through has talked me off the ledge many nights, but I will sadly say that I am in dire straits with my undiagnosed ADD husband. Although I have given him some self-awareness (along with numerous online tests which he will take and be categorized as "highly likely" for ADD....LOL) his refusal to go for help and possibly get on meds has hit a breaking point in our marriage.

Hey everybody,

I am having a problem managing, understanding and dealing with my ADHD husband's financial escapades. When he needs to go on a vacation, he has to go no mater what our financial state is. He is an impulsive spender and needs immediate gratification. If he needs an IPAD then he needs one now!! Trying to keep within a budget and delaying purchases and vacations seem particularly hard for him. Any suggestions?

It is so lonely to be the non ADD spouse because anything you share about your life never seems to be remembered. I don't even know how this can be a relationship. Although there is a lot of compassion for what I am going through at the moment, I feel once that moment is gone , it is also gone from him.  I  just feel like I don't want to share anymore if it disappears from his mind so soon.  We are human beings that have a past,present and dreams of the future and I just don't understand that an ADD person only lives in the moment.