Recent forum posts (all topics)

So I have been learning new things every day.  Today I learned that I really have to change not just saying it actually do it.  My wife has been telling me the problems she has been facing with our marriage I have always took the blame and said I would change but two days later back to doing the same thing over and over to the point now that we have found out that I have ADHD and know that I was not doing those things on purpose.  Having ADHD is not a excess though it may be the reason why but you cannot live life using ADHD as a excuse to ignore you wife or treat your marriage as a norma

I was diagnosed with ADHD only a couple of months ago along with anxiety disorder. I am not any medication, but on breathing exercises and other physical treatments. However, my condition has caused the demise of my seven-year relationship of which 5 were spent in marriage. My husband is a good man with some faults which i was incapable of dealing with in socially appropriate ways. For example, lack of responses to questions or vague answers and explanations used to eat at me so much that i would get angry, aggressive, and sometimes violent.

My wife left me 2 years ago thinking I was abusive.  After a long battle I got a custody evaluation that came down hard on her saying how controlling she is and how great of a dad I am.  I know I have ADD and have a tendency to laziness, but the last 2 years I have made huge strides using some of the coping techniques described in some of these books.  Well, the evaluation coming back so strongly in my favor, everyone saying how much I've grown, and the kids begging to live with me every single day has made an impression.  Suddenly, she's talking about trying things again.

Hi there!

So I'm very new to this forum after spending the week Googling myself into oblivion, which is what I do when I'm trying to figure something out.

I'm hoping that someone else with my same issue can at least offer some support. My husband and I have been married for almost 5 years. I did not know that he had been diagnosed with ADHD as a child, but I did know that he had many behavior problems as a kid. His parents medicated him for a short time, but stopped when he said that he did not like it (around age 8 or so), and he never received other treatment for ADHD that I know of. They just decided to "trust God" that he would grow out of it.

We all know about the hyperfocus, the "swept off our feet" feeling. My marriage imploded shortly after our wedding.

Now I kind of dread when he comes home. I realized the other day that the ONLY thing I loved about him is the hyperfocus, and of course, that's gone. I'm not even sure I love him any more. He says he's just the same but of course he's not.

I'm married to a stranger and he treats me like a stranger. The person I fell in love with no longer exists. He no longer cares about me or meeting my needs. So what do I do now?

I spoke to a Psy.D yesterday and told her I was feeling overwhelming anxiety about my delivery (I'm 37 weeks pregnant). I told her that I feel trapped by my ADHD family. I didn't realize this woman hadn't truly called me to set something up, but to tell me she wouldn't be available. I panicked and began to cry. I pulled myself together and contacted my Insurance company as advised by the Psy.D. I now have an appointment scheduled in less than a week. Now the events that led to my meltdown: everyday I clean, but by the end of the day one could never tell.

So what was an attempt to have a nice family outing at the club turned into pretty awful.  For whatever reason DH had an outburst with Son at the club. Son had no idea why or even really what DH said other than a nasty glare and the a few words that made no sense at all (like walking in on the end of a conversation (I was in Womens Locker Room changing). The car ride home was super quiet; I knew something was up but didn't know what. So we get home I head upstairs to empty out the  gym bags. Then I hear my DD begin to cry.

My ADHD husband of 25 years doesn't work. He was approved for disability almost 3 years ago, for the 2 years prior to that he held a job for a total of 2 months. So basically he has not worked for 5 years. The other 20 years consisted of numerous jobs the longest being 7 years. I can accept that since he is receiving disability payments. We still have a hard time making it financially. I've worked FT for the past 20 years and during most of those years either worked overtime or a 2nd job and raised our 2 children.

I have been reading the posts on this site for several days with great interest. I think that my husband of almost 23 years may have undiagnosed ADD/ADHD . I can relate very closely to many of the comments posted by non-ADHD spouses.