Recent forum posts (all topics)

How to compliment him when his symptoms are so rampant, that his good qualities are swallowed up by them?

My ADHD husband is totally at the mercy of his symptoms right now. I got him to read enough that he agrees he has it.  He is in the “process” of getting himself in somewhere so that he can be diagnosed officially.  Reading between the lines, you know know what that means. 

Of course, he doesn’t understand the scope of their effect yet. And I do understand that and am reminding myself so I don’t hold it against him. 

And in the meantime, I know that it would be so helpful for both of us if I praised him for something.   The trouble?  His symptoms are so rampant.  

THE END OF MY ROPE OR THE BEGINNING OF ANOTHER

Hi, I am new here. I have been reading the blogs and feeling a strange comfort in knowing that other people are facing some of the same problems that my wife and I are facing.

First a little background.  I met my wife four years ago and fell deeply, madly and very quickly in love. (like most add people do) We got married, bought a house and now have two children.  It all happened very fast.

Flirting with children

The most maddening aspect of H's behavior is when one of our granddaughters is here.  I don't know what to do about it.  H and her "get cozy", touching arms and touching heads and leaning in to smile and laugh together.  Granddaughter likes the special attention but a 11 years old does not know about sex and men.  H is impulsive and thinks of himself as sexy and personable.  He is nearly 70 years old and flirts with anyone and everyone - it gets very embarassing to me when I am with him and he encrouches on his targets while I stand there with arms crossed. It is his personality.

Holidays

I do fine on most holidays:  Christmas (a little weird not doing it as a full family but I and at least one daughter always see my side of the family), Thanksgiving (the last time I saw my former parents-in-law was Thanksgiving 2009, when my FIL was cruel to me and refused to apologize, after lying about what he did), Easter (I'm not religious), and either Mother's Day (I was and continue to be a good mother and my daughters usually call me).  But Father's Day depresses me, because it reminds me that my ex dumped me and neglected our daughters so that he could take care of his parents, his

Emotional dumping ground

Forum: 

i seem to give off some kind of energy that makes people want to unload their problems on me. When I was growing up, my mother inappropriately shared problems with me. She complained nonstop about how much she hated her parents. After I got married, my MIL did the something very similar. Except my MIL complained a lot about how much she disliked being a mother and a grandmother. Really inappropriate stuff!!  People that I barely know will confide in me and tell me shocking stories about themselves.

Sorry it might be a boring question..are ADHD and cheating related??

hi, I'm very new to this site. I have a boyfriend who I found out from our couples therapist that he has ADHD a year ago. I read about ADHD and now understand why I was always angry at him about small things and he seemed to not care about me and our little boy safety. I.e leaving the house door wide open when he went out in the evening while I was sick in bed with a breastfeeding 6 months old and drive recklessly with our child in the car. You know all the crazy little and big things that ADHD people do.

She totaled the minivan.

My wife called while I was dropping our daughter off at school yesterday.  She said she got into an accident.  Her explanation was that she tried to stop a a stop sign but her foot slipped.  Our 15-year-old ADHD son was with her.  His version is that she did stop at the sign but then went through the intersection without seeing the other car, with him yelling at her to stop.  After she hit the other guy, she got out and left it in gear.  The van went up  on the sidewalk and hit a stop sign before she could stop it.

Left ADHD Boyfriend - Please Help

Hi all, 

I'm new here and seeking advice from others who have been or are in a relationship with someone with ADHD. I'll try to condense this! I was with my ex boyfriend for about 15 months. It truly seemed like a lifetime and I thought he was the one. (I'm 29 and have been in several long-term relationships, my longest was 6 years. I haven't really been single since I was about 16, and when I was, it was for a couple of months. Part of this likely has to do with dysfunctional parents growing up and having to assume the role of an adult in a lot of instances....)

Companionship

I woke up this morning feeing so deeply lonely in my marriage. One of the purposes of marriage is to have a companion through lifes ups and downs. Someone to share experiences with. I would so love to go on a vacation this summer. I have the choice of going alone or taking my DH along. Either option is sad and lonely. 

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