Recent forum posts (all topics)

What I have come to know and understand is a difference in perception of events in my marriage.

I like things neat and tidy - not obsessive - and things put away when they are finished being used.  My spouse likes everything right out where he can find it.  The counter is a landing spot for anything and everything.

The trick is learning to find a way that both partners can feel comfortable.

I get very frustrated by the amounts of stuff in the backyard and oozing out of the barn.  My spouse does  not understand why I am bothered by his stuff.

Hello,

I've been wondering what the long-term effects of angry outbursts are on children. By angry outbursts I mean yelling, pounding fists on things, maybe a curse words at anything from spilled water to traffic jams, to cars not going fast enough, power outages etc. They can happen once daily sometimes more or less, depending on the mood. How does this affect young children who witness this behavior from their ADHD father? Would like to hear from anyone. If you experienced it as a child or with your children who are now grown up, would like to hear that as well!

Hi all,

From day 1 it has been me and the kids - and then him.  It's like he's separate from us.  He's here, but he's not HERE.  We had 5 kids in  6 years and I have yet to feel like he's fully in on this.  He deals with them and me only when he feels like it and it's convenient for him.  He will never go out of his way or be put out for any of us.  It's always his comfort, his head hurts, his legs hurt, his pinky toe hurts.  He'll huff and puff if I ask him to do even something simple like tie a shoe for one of the kids.

I am a married < 3yrs, 41yo male recently-diagnosed with ADD:Primarily Inattentive. My non-ADHD wife and I are miserable. The dynamic I describe below is now one of our most common causes of conflict and a serious barrier to effective management of ADHD in our relationship.  I'm a long-time lurker here, and am looking for any insight the wonderful people of this forum, especially the non-ADHD spouses, may have to offer.

My girlfriend and I have been together now for about a year. When we first started dating, like all relationships, the coo coo stayed in the clock. It wasn't long before my jealous nature got the best of me and compounded by my ADD I began to slip. Get jealous about this minuscule event, blow up, apologize, hold it back for a bit, smother with love and repeat. All the while with her never having done anything wrong. These ups and downs have forced her to pull away, and me to grip and yearn for her. Clearly my self contious was bored and looking for trouble.

I read the author's blog post : " How to Find Gratitude in a Struggling ADHD-Impacted Relationship"  Being the non-ADHD partner in my marriage, I have searched out what I can do to make my marriage thrive.  I have swallowed my pride more times than I ever thought I could, and put on the cloak of "It must be me."  I have been given "what for", and did not fight back, thinking maybe sitting in the posture of "she who made the mistake" would help the situation turn around.